Finding Out We're Pregnant Again After 4 Miscarriages…

Hello everyone! Thank you guys all so much for all of the love and all the comments and support on our pregnancy announcement videos. It honestly means the world to us and it's really the most freeing feeling to have you guys all know because it's so hard to keep this little secret. It's like, you know, it consumes your whole life. So when we're trying to share our life with you, it's like really hard to hide it. And not only that, but like being able to get to this point where we're able to share it just is like such a milestone

because it means that this is finally a successful pregnancy that we have been waiting for so long for. I'm sitting here by myself right now because this is actually a very, very very very vulnerable video for me to make. Honestly for me and Julius and he obviously has his own like perspective and pain and you know all of that from all of the pregnancy

experiences that we've gone through but it's just really easier for me to just sit here by myself and talk to you guys because there's literally nobody in the room with me so like I can just talk freely and like cry and I know I can do that with him too but I don't know something about just being with the camera and like nobody else in the room just like makes me super vulnerable not only are we gonna be sharing when we found out that

we are pregnant but we're actually gonna be sharing all of the other times that we found out we were pregnant within the last year. You guys don't really know everything that has gone on this past year. It has been a lot to say the least and the only reason that I'm sharing this, this is not meant to be like a sad video. I want this to be more of like a beacon of hope for some people because I know I am not the only woman going through this and I know when you do go

through these experiences and have miscarriages or any type of like fertility issues or whatever you may be going through, it is such a lonely feeling and miscarriages, the way I always describe them, it's like a really, really lonely grief

because you and your partner are like the only ones who had any sort of connection to this little baby that was growing inside of you. Nobody else knew about it or it was like invisible to the rest of the world. So you're the only one really grieving it

and you're the only one who really truly understands the pain and the loss. Even though you never got to meet them or anything like that, the pain is just immense. It's really, really a difficult feeling to explain unless you have actually been through it yourself.

So as you'll probably see along this journey, each time that we find out, our emotions and everything kind of changes. So it might be confusing because if somebody just saw them and they're like, why are they so anxious or like worried?

And it's because there's all of these other thoughts that are going through your head. Like you're obviously so excited, but you're also so scared at the same time. So I'm gonna take you back to the very beginning before I even had COA.

My first ever pregnancy before I was pregnant with Koa, I ended up having a miscarriage which a lot of you guys may know about because we did share it and it was one of the most heartbreaking things that we had ever gone through at that point because we were just so excited for our first ever baby and then for it to end like that was just such a heartbreaking, terrible, terrible feeling.

Like we were both literally depressed in bed for weeks. But luckily, we got blessed with baby Koa, and I was pregnant right away, like very, very quickly after I had the miscarriage, I was pregnant with Koa. So, I mean, even though that loss was really hard, being able to get pregnant right again so quickly did kind of help with, you know, like the whole healing process.

And then we had Koa and the pregnancy with him, it was not really the easiest. Towards the end of the pregnancy, I was high risk, but I do remember like in that second trimester when it's like that prime time where you're not too big yet and most of like the nausea has already gone

away, that first trimester nausea. I remember thinking during that time like wow I could be pregnant forever like I love being pregnant and now thinking back to that it's just so sad to me because now I've had six pregnancies and so like my experience of pregnancy is not that anymore like it's not that just like super blissful, like I mean, obviously it's the most beautiful thing

and I'm so happy, but those beginning stages, it's just pure worry the whole time. So after I had COA, I did get on birth control for a while and then I can't remember exactly when I got off of it. I wanna say either late 2023 or early 2024. Somewhere around that time. And then that started like the whole just year of doom you

guys. Literally the year of doom. I think I might be pregnant. Lately we've been feeling like now's the time. We're ready for another baby. I'm so so so nervous I'm pregnant you guys. I'm just so happy because this it's just like the perfect perfect perfect most ideal time. We're just in such a good place. Everything's coming together in our life.

And oh my gosh, my little baby's gonna have a brother

or sister.

Today's the day that I'm telling Julius that we are pregnant with baby number two. Today is 4th of July.

You're lying. I swear. of July. You're lying.

I swear.

Shut up, you're lying.

Look it.

Go, go, give it to Dada.

Ah!

Really?

Swear to God.

Watch, Jakey. Oh, oh, oh.

Oh, it's mine.

Mine.

It's not yours? Not your daddy?

But you're gonna have a brother or a sister.

We're gonna have a baby.

An all baby.

Wow. Are you kidding me? Seriously? Hey babe, we're gonna have a girl. I think we're gonna have a girl.

Oh! Yeah!

Yeah!

And I've been waiting all this time. Let's go!

We gotta be gentle with mama.

Hey, we gotta be gentle with mama.

You guys gotta be careful.

Mama! Mama! Mama!

Hey, not a daddy of one, a daddy of two!

I thought I would be eight weeks pregnant today, but I now know that that's not the case. I started bleeding, and at first it started off light. I tried to stay positive. I'm still trying to be positive now,

but I'm still continuing to bleed. It's bright red and today I passed the blood clot. I've been putting it off for days, not wanting to go to the hospital just because I just don't feel ready to accept if it is a bad outcome. I could potentially just be taken away without any explanation as to why for the second time. It's hard. It's really, really hard.

I think I'm stronger now and I'm gonna get through it. And it's gonna be okay. It's gonna be okay. It always is. It's gonna hurt, but it's gonna be okay.

And if it's meant for me to have another baby I will So Destiny is feeling like she is pregnant right now.

You think I'm pregnant?

No, she...

You keep telling me to take one.

Well, I think she's pregnant every time. Oh yeah?

You want to find out together this time?

Yeah, I want to find out together.

I feel like, you know, we're older. We've been doing a lot of stuff when it comes to pregnancies and stuff, so... One, two, three. I'm going to do two. We've been doing a lot of stuff when it comes to pregnancies and stuff.

One, two, three.

I'm going to do two.

Do you see how bad I'm shaking? I'm like literally shaking.

I'm not going to lie.

I'm nervous.

I'm going to just, if she is, I'm going to be extremely happy. And if she's not, one of these days.

I'm like stressing out really bad. I'm so nervous.

I'm freaking out.

I don't know.

I'm so nervous.

I think I'm gonna cry because I'm so nervous.

Are you worried?

I'm not worried.

Well like stressed?

No. Why am I then? I don't know. Life is amazing. Reproducing is great.

I'm like hyperventilating. I feel like I'm gonna pass out, like actually.

Why?

I don't know. I don't know. I'm just like so...

Okay, what do you know?

Are you ready?

1, 2, 3.

I'm pregnant.

Huh?

I'm pregnant.

Wait, what?

I'm literally pregnant. Look, both of them have a line.

Wait hold on hold on hold on. How do we read this? Hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on. Hold on though hold on. Alright now I'm shaking a little bit.

Wait hold on though wait. I didn't know what literally I was like telling you like two days ago that I'm pregnant

and I didn't even take a test yet, but I just knew.

Wow, you're pregnant. Are you excited? I'm excited. Yeah guys, this is like very, it's a nervous time for us every time because been through a lot in these situations but this time we about to be the most positive through it all don't matter what we gotta do you know I'm saying we're not gonna cry we're not gonna stress we're gonna just enjoy and we're gonna you know what I'm saying, we're gonna get righteous. It's just really scary. But it's okay.

We're gonna get good.

Do you think this is the time?

I think this is the one time.

Do you think, why?

I think this is the time.

Just because, I feel like it's like, you know, we've been through a-

I literally told you.

I knew I was pregnant.

We've been going through a lot. And I think God just is, just, you know, he...

Oh, wait. I told him that I was pregnant with Koa on Valentine's Day of 2021. They're going to be birthday twins! Because it's February 10th. Oh my gosh, we get pregnant the same day. Imagine this is the one that actually sticks.

Yeah, no, it's sticking this time. That would be actually crazy, bro. I ain't gonna lie, that would be crazy.

What?

My cheeks hurt because I can't, I just haven't stopped smiling.

Imagine, they're birthday twins.

My cheeks hurt.

See, this is what's hard though, that you like...

It's okay, though. We're gonna be good. You just gotta...

Automatically just start thinking of everything.

No, but you can't just stress, and you just gotta just relax. I know, but it's... it's like... And then now we gotta... you gotta start taking your prenatals. We gotta honestly... It's like hard to... because you don't want to get attached to it until you know for sure. Yeah, but this time we got to just like do everything we can.

We've already we've been through the worst. We know it. We good. We're going to get through this one.

We've been through we've literally been through the worst.

I know.

You know what I'm saying?

So all we can do now is just be as positive as possible.

Do you think this is going gonna be the one. I think this will be the one. Has to be, huh? Well, you know they say, like, third time's the charm, and then we just had like two pregnancies last year.

And this is like the same time as last time.

Oh my gosh.

That last pregnancy also unfortunately ended in a miscarriage. That one was very different, especially physically on my body. Also mentally, I guess. I mean, they're all mentally hard. But physically, that one, as you can see from the dates,

I found out I was pregnant February 10th. Everything was going fine at first, and then eventually, probably like a month later, I did start having some light spotting. But I have literally had some type of spotting slash bleeding for every pregnancy,

even my pregnancy with Koa, and even this current pregnancy. that's why I went to the hospital a couple weeks ago to make sure that everything was okay. so I try not to always automatically think the worst but I mean usually my mind does go to the worst places but I mean I still try to keep like some sort of hope. and then the bleeding just stopped. it was really only for like probably one or two days

and it was very light, just completely stopped. And then I had my doctor's appointment with my actual OBGYN scheduled. And that was probably like an entire month after I had the light spotting. So by this point, like I have been pregnant

for a good chunk of time, right? So when I went in, I was kind of like prepared for anything I kind of had thought like oh I most likely have already had a miscarriage because I did go to like one of those little baby ultrasound places and they did see like the sack and everything but the sack was empty so I was like okay I probably just had another miscarriage and all of my other miscarriages my body just kind of like released and flushed everything

out itself. But this time, after a whole month of having already started the spotting, when I went to the doctor, I still had all of that pregnancy material in my body. My body was holding on to it, not letting it go. And my HCG levels were still really, really high. They were still at like 18,000,

which usually every other time I've been having a miscarriage, the highest it was was like maybe 3,000 or 4,000, sometimes even like in the 300s. So this time, 18,000 was like really, really high. So my doctor wasn't even sure right away, like if I was like really really high. So my doctor wasn't even sure right away like if I was like pregnant again or if I was having a miscarriage or what but after

like doing all the tests and everything we figured out that I was having another miscarriage. My body just was holding on to all of the pregnancy material so that time instead of passing everything myself my doctor actually had to prescribe me something to medically remove all of the pregnancy material and that was actually really painful. And of the pregnancy material and that was actually really painful. And then emotionally by that point that was

already my fifth pregnancy so like my mind just started going to the worst place you guys. Like I started doing the math in my head like at this rate I'm one for five for pregnancies. Like that means I have a 20% chance of my pregnancies actually being successful. To be honest, I even started convincing myself that I maybe didn't even want any more kids just because I could not take the heartbreak again, you guys.

Like I could not take being put through that all over again, of being so excited and hopeful and trying to stay positive that I would have a successful pregnancy for it to just end the same. And to have it happen back to back, three times in a row within less than a year

was like just terrible. I started convincing myself that like I wasn't even meant to be a mom or that like I wasn't a good enough mom. Like my mind just started going to the worst, worst places. But it's crazy because this is such a full circle moment.

You're about to see when I found out I was pregnant and I'm currently successfully pregnant and in the safe zone. And I found out on June 29th, which was almost exactly a year from when that first of the three last miscarriages

first started. So it's just such a full circle moment and I'm so happy to be out of it. And I just feel so blessed, so blessed. And I also, I do want to thank my brother, Isaiah. I found out on his birthday and I just can't help

but feel like he blessed me this time.

I'm taking a pregnancy test today. It is Sunday, June 29th. And I'm not like fully convinced that I'm pregnant, but I had a little situation where I felt like it was implantation bleeding a couple of days ago. Like it was only for like a few hours to a day

and then it just stopped. So that kind of raised suspicion, reason to think I could be pregnant. I feel like I take a test so often, like literally more months I take a test than I don't. But you know, that's what happens when you're not on birth control. There's always a possibility.

So let's find out. Let's see. Okay, it's only been like a minute, so it's not ready yet, but I think I see a line coming up.

You're freaking lying, you guys, wait. Oh.

Hold on. Oh, you guys, I think it's a second line. Oh my gosh.

Hold on.

I have to tell you because I can't not tell him. Guys, I'm so nervous, hold on. What the heck? I cannot believe this.

Should I, wait, should I tell him now or should I not?

They're back, Oh my gosh.

Babe, come here really quick.

Holy schnapps.

It's there, right? Yeah, it's definitely there. Oh I think I just had implantation bleeding remember you guys I'm like a freaking pro already of knowing when I'm pregnant because what the heck girl this is pregnancy number 6

this is probably the most unexpected thing because I was just coming to the side right now

this is unexpected for me I was just saying like I don't think I'm pregnant

did you take another one? take another one up in here

I'm like shaking right now

oh my gosh

and then oh my gosh well then like another reason why I decided to take lunch. That's what I was saying.

Dip it for three seconds.

Yeah.

Okay, wait, what kind of feeling do you have about this one?

Is it good?

Oh, Koya, we have a brother and sister.

Are you excited?

Come on.

And oh, that's another reason you guys, Kola has been so attached to me, babe. How attached has he been to me?

Bro, it's been kind of annoying, bro.

Like he literally has been clinging onto me. He will not leave my side.

Look at mama's belly.

We got a baby brother and sister. Are you excited? Are you? my side so now this we have to really go to the doctors right away you have to do everything it might be we're gonna have to figure everything out right away

I gotta start taking the progesterone. Yeah, right away. Right away.

We should go get it today. Right now.

It's time to get it.

No, I think you have to get it prescribed maybe.

You know?

Yeah, I think you can get it.

Are you excited?

Yeah, we gotta go.

Or are you nervous? You're nervous. I'm not nervous. No, we just gotta get it going. No, now you're a little bit more like worrisome, huh? Like, you gotta, you gotta... This is the... That's why he's been so clingy!

I was wondering, that was another reason that made me think like, wait, am I pregnant or something? Cause he has never in his life been this clingy. Like, obviously he loves me and he loves like cuddling and stuff, but he has been not letting his paws off me. Like, at all, you guys.

There it is. Confirmed.

Yeah. Oh, my gosh.

Wait, I'm going to cry. Why? Why? Today's Isaiah's birthday.

Really? That's insane.

Damn.

That's insane. I don't know. Well I knew it was his birthday but oh my gosh.

I didn't put two and two together like I was taking it today until just look.

That's so crazy.

This one's probably a good one babe.

What do you think?

I think so.

Do you think?

Oh my gosh.

I can't believe it you guys.

I'm like a lot more excited this time. What do you think? I think so. Do you think? Oh my gosh. I can't believe it, you guys. I'm like a lot more excited this time.

Usually I'm kind of nervous, but for some reason,

I'm just...

I'm more just excited this time.

So... Hopefully...

Hopefully this one's good.

Okay, now Juju is joining us for the rest. So now he can, I talked this whole darn video. You guys are probably tired of me so now you can.

Well it's you, it's your whole pregnancy, you know what I'm saying? It's a lot of your emotions, what's going on and how you feel, you know?

But like I said in the beginning of this video, even though all of these clips may seem kind of sad the only reason we're even showing all this is because we're through it all and we're pregnant again and we're in such a good place so we kind of want to like leave all of that sadness in the past and like release it out of our bodies and into the universe and just embrace and accept this beautiful moment and face that we are in our new life. Coco, do you want to come?

Cause you're making your presence known, handsome.

What's up, bro?

He walked over.

What's up?

Are you excited for your baby?

Say yeah.

Yeah, you're excited for your baby.

But like Destiny said, you know, we're trying to just move past all that stuff. Obviously we've been through it and it made us who we are today and honestly, we just want to celebrate and go past this and we have such a bright future and me and Destiny have been sitting here

and just cherishing this moment Now that we're past that, we have a lot ahead of us We have to figure out baby name baby gender we got baby shower we got a lot of stuff ahead of us we hope you guys are ready as well and also I really want to just give a huge huge thank you to every single person who took the time out of their day and commented on anything that we posted.

What's up?

Whether it's Instagram, whether it's TikTok, whether it's YouTube, or just even sending us a DM, I just wanna, you know, send a huge thank you to everybody. I can really feel the family in everything that we have going on. So, you know, it's great to have a huge family of supporters and you

know we just want to let you guys know that we love you guys a lot so with all

that being said we hope you guys enjoyed learning about our whole journey we sure did enjoy sharing it with you guys our next video is when we heard the heartbeat for the first time and Julius cried like a baby you guys he cried way more than me for like 20 minutes straight

like you guys don't understand like he never find out you're pregnant it's a different like for us I feel like it's a little bit different feeling because you know we've been through a lot of stuff but once you hear that heartbeat it's like it's real guys you guys understand but you guys will see that in the next video So stay tuned

We love you guys so much and we'll see you next time We love you guys so much and we'll see you next time Peace