GOP Scrambles to Assure Everyone That Mitch McConnell Is Alive | The Daily Show

Despite what Donald Trump wants you to think, he doesn't run the government all by himself.There's a whole other legislative branch with 435 congresspeople and 100 senators.Or maybe 99.

Tonight, growing concern about the health of Senator Mitch McConnell.The Kentucky Republican and former majority leader is 84 years old, and he's been hospitalized for three weeks now.It's still unclear why he was admitted or when he'll be released.

I think it's pretty clear why he was admitted.He's an incredibly old man.He's half the age of America, all right?Look at him.He's probably diagnosed with, uh, I don't know, being extremely 84.But apparently, people don't like a majority senator disappearing with no explanation for three weeks.

So the governor of Kentucky contacted him in a way that old people love, mail.

Kentucky Governor Andy Beshear has sent a letter to Kentucky Senator Mitch McConnell requesting an update on his health.

Dear Senator McConnell, over the last several weeks, Kentuckians have grown increasingly concerned about the current state of your health and well -being and ability to hold office in the United States Senate.We wish you a safe and speedy recovery.

The fact that this letter exists is not a great sign, OK?It's like, hey, kids, grandpa is doing great.Now let's all write him a nice letter asking him to breathe on a mirror.if we wish you a safe and speedy recovery almost sounds like trolling for a letter like this although honestly I'm not sure how you sign off on a letter asking where you're asking someone to prove that they're not dead it's like writing thanks in advance no worries if not but it's nice of the governor of Kentucky to write a letter because other people are not being as polite there have been this growing

chorus of rumors, of speculation, of just what is Senator Mitch McConnell's condition.We still haven't seen a photo of Mitch McConnell.He should be able to shoot a 60 -second proof -of -life video to show us that he's okay.

You're asking for a proof -of -life video from the hospital?84 -year -olds have trouble shooting video when they're perfectly healthy, okay?If he can shoot a video without his thumb covering the camera, we should make him king of America.Besides, what good is a proof -of -life video?We're talking about Mitch McConnell.For the past two years, we've been watching him in videos where I have no idea if he's alive.

I mean, look at this.Look at this.Is -is this a...Is this a picture or a video?You have no idea.But, hey, maybe all this isn't even necessary, because yesterday, a whole bunch of Mitch's friends all came out at the same time and said, it's fine, we totally talked to him.

Republican leaders in the Senate said that they had spoken to McConnell.

We're gonna just show some onscreen, all saying, I talked to him, I talked to him, I talked to him for 20 minutes.

That's right, he's doing that totally normal, alive person thing where you spend your day calling multiple guys for 20 minutes.It's -it's all very legit.We need real proof.Scott Jennings, you used to work with Mitch McConnell.

Is he all right?Yeah, he called me, uh, this morning, uh, before I did my radio show.We talked for about 17 minutes.Yeah, okay, no, no, that's good.

No, I'm sorry, I gotta call bullshit.17 minutes is way too specific of a number.When you describe phone calls, you say 15 minutes or 20 minutes.Anything else is like a deposition.But okay, Scott Jennings, tell us more about this extremely real conversation you had with a very alive person.

He talked a lot about the situation with Iran, talked a little bit about Ukraine and what's going on in Europe.Uh, I told him I've been to the Teddy Roosevelt Library.We talked a little bit about the history of the vice presidency and how Roosevelt had transformed that, uh, in the modern presidency, a little history of the Senate.

Yeah, of course you did.Yeah, yeah, yeah.We talked about Teddy Roosevelt's contributions to our national park system, and then Senator McConnell said, actually, Teddy's right here with me.

He's hovering beside my bed.Should I put him on real quick?

For more, let's go live to our senior political correspondent, Michael Kosta.Michael.

Ronnie, I'm here at the hospital, and I just got a chance to speak to Senator McConnell for roughly 43 .3 minutes.And, uh, Ronnie, he's doing great.That is an oddly specific number.Well, that's just how long living human friends talk for.He wanted to talk longer, but he had five more phone calls he had to get in before leading a Zoom trivia night.Michael, with all due respect, is that really true?

Ronnie, with all due respect, shut up.Mitch McConnell's health is none of your business.Yes, it is.He's a sitting U .S.senator.

He's a sitting U .S.senator.Do you even hear yourself?Let me break it down for you.A senator is better than us.

This is the system our founding fathers envisioned.Representation by an elite group of quasi -corpses who owe us nothing and cling to power even through rigor mortis.God, they nailed it.No, no, don't applaud, you psychos.That's not the system.Well, you weren't there.

Mitch was.So maybe show him a little respect.And your obsession with him, honestly, it's embarrassing.And that's the same thing I told Mitch earlier when we were surfing.There's no way you went surfing with him.I couldn't believe it either.

I thought he'd be tired after Pilates, but this dude, he's a machine.

I think you're just covering for him, Costa, and the American people deserve transparency from our senators.

American people, transparency, senators.With all due respect, Ronnie, eat shit and die.If we get rid of Mitch, where does it end?We get rid of all the other aging, cognitively impaired, technically dead senators?Discrimination, and it would be illegal if Mitch McConnell's Supreme Court hadn't overturned it.Yeah, that's fine.

That's fine.I want to discriminate against people who are too old to be senators.That's so bigoted, you make me sick.Metaphorically, not sick like all the old senators.And worst of all, your attitude, Ron, it's gonna bum Mitch out.He's not even gonna be excited for our volcano hike later.

Okay, if he's doing volcano hikes, then why can't you show him to us?

I would, but I can't.Why not?

Because, look, I shouldn't say, but if you want the honest truth, he's in a hospital room right now, in his bed, absolutely giving it to his wife.Are you happy now?I mean, you can hear him going at it.Clear!Maybe not for you, they're not, but you don't do it like Mitch.He and his missus have been at it for 46 .8 minutes, and they... they're not slowing down, Ronnie.

Oh, God, forget it.Michael Kosta, everybody.