SALMAFINA MELEDAK! “SAYA SUDAH DIAM, KENAPA ISTRI KAMU NYENGGOL SAYA TERUS?!”| Dilan No Filter

So the problem is because Salma was once sued by her ex-husband for a legging issue. Yes, at first. But again, it's a circulating issue. But what many people don't know is that it's just a tip of the iceberg. Just one of the reasons. Just the tip of an iceberg, which actually has a of the reasons. It was just one of the many reasons. But it was a viral video at that time.

Do you believe me? At the moment I was divorced, I didn't say anything to my parents. I acted like everything was fine. So your parents didn't know at that time? No, they didn't. You cried alone in your room?

Alone.

Not long after yesterday's celebration, there's this star of mine who got angry because her ex-husband's wife was single. Let's welcome,

Palma.

Thank you, Kadilan. This is the first time I met Kadilan, and the first time I was invited to her podcast. Thank you so much! Thank you for inviting me to come here. You're welcome. So lately, I've been hearing the news that Salma is angry at IG story

because there's a snitch. The snitch is the past, right? story again, Karna, I think go, yeah, I'm young and gold it to a dollar muscle a little yeah, I'm yet to look at the partner. Is Trina mantan Swami? Yeah, but

but I'm going to tell them a man, Montana, Swami, I took a and get a subpoena to end and

is Trina and

Karan it to ST yeah, get a subpoena to get the yeah, they are We call it ST, so we can be comfortable together. I want to know, this is our first time meeting. Is it far from here?

It's quite far.

I'm really thankful that you took the time to come here. You're so busy. You're really into sports, right? Yeah, I'm just into sports. I feel like your body is really... No, I'm still in the process. So, what do you do now?

Do you go to the gym every week? I also have a business in the sports field. I have a few pilates studios. So, now my hobby is just exercising, and I also have a business. So, pilates, not gym, right?

I do both, but for my business, I do pilates. That's why your body is so beautiful. Aww, I like it. Thank you. I'm going to say something. Wait a minute.

Thank you. So, why did you get angry with her? I don't think I got angry with her. I just wanted to calm her down. I was wondering, because there was an incident where my ex-husband's wife posted something about me. So that she could make threats.

She asked me to prove that if the divorce was due to lagging, I would prove it. That's why I felt like I had to be arrested. So the problem was because Salma was sued for divorce with her ex-husband because of lagging issue. Yes, at first. But again, it was a circulating issue. But what many people didn't know,

it was just a tip of the iceberg. Just one of the reasons. Just the tip of an iceberg, which actually had a lot of people. But it was a very viral issue at that time. So, the wife of the ex-husband's wife said, if the marriage is a legging,

then why did he hit on you? The point is, he wanted me to prove it. Actually, if we look back, from the initial chronology, I didn't know anything. Suddenly, my friends said, Have you seen this post?

Then I said What post? Because honestly, if you look at my Instagram All of my posts are turn off comments Because I don't want to know Whatever it is out there, I don't want to know

So my close friends who understand me They usually understand To not say things That can make me dizzy because hearing negative things that continue continuously is traumatic, right? So I choose not to tell me anything Then my friend said, yes, you were single with your ex-husband

My first response was like this, it's normal, just leave it It's true, because I mean, yes, it's okay, right? Want to be single, want to be tied, yes, it's okay, just leave it. I mean, I was like, it's okay, just leave it. I don't care if they want to make a scene or not. But my friend said, I think you have to see this. Just watch it. So I watched it and I was like, what is this?

It turned out to be a thread. It was a thread that he made, and turned out to be a rune, the chronology is so it seems like the ex-wife of the ex-husband is wearing a legging then somewhat seems to be posted, then there is a netizen who commented on the Instagram of my ex-husband, then the netizen's comment was pinned by my ex-husband but the one with my name, the comment is like if I'm not mistaken, in a deep in some amount and so me cool. Tapi. I don't know my cool I'm gonna open a minute to kayak. I'll not a liar kayak in TNK a CCO Sivina got boleh

Nikolaku masala ya, but we are there. I'll beg on that. I'm a get to see Vena Kong a boy a puppy is a young boy a in TNK a good Oh, then it would be pin your wisdom to not pin my name. I'm sure there are 10 comments like that, about lagging. Just choose the one who doesn't use my name. It's nice, right?

Not using your name, but can you not say, why is your ex-wife's name? Sure, it's okay. Why do I have to have my name in so many comments? But you can't say, why is your ex-wife... I can! Like that? I can! It's okay, it's okay. I mean, why... From all the comments, why does it have to be my name? So, the point is, that's how it started.

So... After that, his wife made a thread. Thread? The content is... The... Oh, I forgot again.

The point is, it's like she's worried about being tagged as a lagging person So many netizens responded It's like she's trying to convince people that the fact is not because of lagging So netizens said, why is it? Just tell us the truth! It's so rude! The netizen said, why? The facts are open. So rude. I was like, oh.

That's it. But because of that thread, I saw that he asked for proof. So I mentioned it to him. Sorry, I want to make sure. What kind of proof did he ask for? He asked for proof that the divorce was because of the lagging.

So it was purely because of the lagging. Oh, so it was purely due to the lagging? Yes, but I mean, I think I said it before, that I wanted the divorce to happen. And that's because of many factors? Because of many factors. And maybe the court also experienced it, this is a separate matter, I mean,

sometimes in court, it's can be better. You are a joke Yeah, don't apply. He called up when you are not gonna go no Guinea, then line and rebate What do you do? I'm a kabatulan aku mean take a Papa to a Kublai kayak. Yeah Poconya aku mau and so on, so that it's quick, how do I discuss it with my father, then my father said, yes, let's just put it in if there is no match, so if for example the data is accessed, he said it can be done, yes, there is only no match because I am the one who asked,

again, it also means that it doesn't need one Indonesia to know the root of the problem. So I'm confused. I'm really sorry. I want to digress. I mean, the ex-wife, the ex-husband's wife, said in the post, she wore leggings, why is it okay for the ex-wife not not get divorced because of the legging? She said she asked for proof that the legging was the reason for their divorce. It's like there's no proof that the leg a cause of divorce. So he asked for it.

So it's not because of the legging. What's the name? The divorce. He pretended to be okay with the legging. Yes, that's right. So it's not because of the legging.

That's right. Because of that, in my opinion, because his husband made my name clear, it was clearly written in the comments, I mentioned her husband's wife. You were not happy with it.

I just asked, why? What's the point? Why? And honestly, from the bottom of my heart, honestly, my expectation when I mentioned his wife

was for him to be like, Sorry, or say something nice, I've erased that. This and that. I'm a Javanese,

so I'm polite. But when I saw the reply, I thought, she's younger than me, but I called her sister. She's my sister. I'm so sorry, but she's not here. If Khadilah reads this, she'll be upset.

She'll be even more upset. What did she call you? Actually, it's not like that. What did he call you? He called me, but he said, just post it. Oh, I see. Just post it if it's true. I said I don't have any obligation to post it.

So if you want to know, just meet me. You're the one who needs it. You're the one who's out there. If you ask me to show you the facts. You don't have to be on social media. I think it's better if we meet and talk.

I'll tell you what you want to know. But if that happens, I don't think I'll reveal everything. Because it's not like I'm your husband. It's different if you come to me before you get married. And you want to know what it's how to filter your husband's candidates, maybe I would be happy to tell you more or less what it's like.

But now that you're a wife, I think it's not important. But I'm like that, I'm a pakem. If you want to know, meet me. I don't want to post anything. Babe, this is all in the past. Yes, it's all in the past. It's been more than 5 years.

It's been almost 9 years. 9 years. You have a lot of options in your life. You can just ignore it. Or you don't have to accept such a thing. Why did you choose to accept it?

Because, the problem is usually related to the netizen. Honestly, if my life is related to him or he is related to me, can't I'm He asked me to prove it, so I felt like I had to speak up. Just this once, because I never said anything. Just this time, I wanted to speak up a little. So, why did you speak up? Why did you accept it? Because you were asked to accept it.

Yes, I was asked to accept it. I was asked to prove it. That's it.

Yes.

Oh, okay.

That's it. I was asked for clarification. I see. I see. Is it tiring to be always tied to your ex-husband? No, it's not tiring. Because, I repeat, the consequence is like that. If many people know about divorce and marriage,

then it's okay. That's the consequence that I've accepted from the beginning. So, if you ask me if it's tiring, honestly, no. You don't that you're happy, right? No, if you're happy and enjoying it, I'll say no. But it's more like, well, this is a consequence of life,

I have to accept it. So you just accept it, right? Like, whatever, what can I do? What can I say? Everyone knows. So the reason for the marriage is a marriage. As far as I know, it's a month-long marriage, right?

Yes, it's a month-long marriage.

Only 3 months?

More or less, I forgot. Because it's been quite a long time. The marriage only lasted 3 months, and it's said that one of the causes is lagging. Are there other factors? It's said, I've seen it in your IG story,

you updated that there are other women who are disturbing your wedding Actually, I never said that But Here, sorry I'm making sure So you posted on IG story

Someone commented It seems like from the beginning it was already there in the pendant, until finally only this photo has become a problem, then you react. Yes, indeed, from the first day of marriage there are already many problems, the marriage is viral, but there are still women who dare to enter, even though the marriage has not been one week are already being rejected by your ex-husband. And it makes sense when you said, Oh, I'm divorced, it's not just a matter of a few months, I also have this problem that I can't explain one by one,

maybe because there are so many reasons why I can get divorced. So this is a fun fact, even though I won't open it, I don't know why. When we pray, we can ask God to remove the memory, because it doesn't feel good. But God doesn't let me lose that memory. So I really pray from before marriage, until the divorce, I can do it all one by one.

I can, I can. Yes, for this problem, yes, there is, but honestly, to be arrested or not, what I see is just a chat. But that's also... I was called by my friends. I didn't mean to take my phone. I was on the elevator.

I remember I was on the elevator and I took my phone. It was a different time. I was just being normal. Praise God, I'm not a nosy person. I'm not nosy and I'm not possessive. I just let it be.

I got a notification and I closed my phone. So I just let it be. Then, I got a notification,

I closed it again.

And I acted like nothing happened.

Hmm.

So at that time, you didn't confirm it? I didn't confirm it. No? No. But I know. But at the time of the divorce,

did you mention that you also had another girl, right? The one who was threatening you, you didn't mention the scary things. So, he knew you asked for a divorce because of the mismatch. Did he know? He knew I was ugly, but he didn't know that I knew he was ugly.

Oh.

Like that.

Because, thank you so much. I never said this, but thank you so much for the students and students of Egypt at that time. Because our marriage is viral, so everything he made there was monitored by people there were a lot of photos that were in, honestly so there were a lot of photos, photos of this, photos of that, info of this, info of that as long as I was here, I kept getting it

so it's back to that, why did he I'm back to the same thing. Maybe he always sees the same person as me. Because he doesn't know that I know a lot. Maybe it's more to that direction. The photo with the third woman? Maybe with her friend. If I say, maybe just friends.

But, sis. Even if they're friends, honestly, I think it's unfair. Because I'm not allowed to be friends with non-Muslims. It's a double standard. He can, I can't.

It's not fair. That's all. I'm not saying I don't follow the rules. But in this world, we have to have a saying, walk the talk. If you talk, you walk it. That's what I didn't get.

I will have more respect for a man who, when he makes the decision, he can play his role well too. So it's not double standard. I see you're also a very fair person. And you're a strong woman. Even though you said earlier that you remember the small details.

It's very traumatic. Like the wedding yesterday. Have you recovered yet? I have. I haven't. I personally always say,

because, praise the Lord, when I have a problem, I don't run away. I go to a psychiatrist, I go to a psychologist. I do all the tools that can help me recover. Because I want to recover. So, if I'm asked to talk about the past, the past and so on, I'm very calm.

Very calm. No emotion. If I ask you to describe your present as a disaster, from 1% to 100% What was it like back then? How much was it destroyed?

Well, because I'm also very logical So I didn't say I was destroyed But I was safe Not destroyed anymore, but at the end of the day Because I was the one who challenged At the end of the day, I was like Like, oh, it's really like this

No, it can't be It, oh, no, I can't. You can't continue? Yes, I can't. So, I saved myself, and he wanted to break up, so I was like, I can't.

So, I don't consider myself broken, but more like, fortunately, it didn't last long. Honestly, yes. It's been a while. I'm being honest. It's been a while. But the trauma still remains, right? I don't see it as a trauma.

But I learned a lot. I swear, a lot. Maybe that's why I don't get married anymore. I learned a lot from my short marriage. So now I filter men more. You're a very picky person.

I don't care if people say I'm picky. I have to choose. Because the last time I didn't choose, I got divorced. I don't want a relationship that... as long as there's a guy. As long as he can make me happy.

No, no, no. It has to be long term. The thinking has to be long. So when you were with TM, you didn't choose? Not that I didn't choose. We actually met on social media. Then we had our first meeting.

Or was it the second one? If I'm not mistaken, it was the second one. He asked me to marry him. I said, okay, fine. I'm also young. No problem.

I thought, okay. So, we was a short introduction. And honestly, at that time... Do you believe me? I've never even held a cat toy. I was a bit nervous. As if I bought a cat in a bag.

But it's all my fault. I didn't say it was his fault. It's all my fault. I didn't filter it was her fault. It's all my fault. I didn't filter it from the beginning.

Right.

I didn't... I didn't get too excited, like, yeah, we're getting married. But it's all... I never blamed her. It's my fault. I didn't filter it. I didn't look for a background check. Honestly, Papa missed it. That's why he's so angry. He was so angry because he also felt like he was buying a cat in a basket.

Like, it was so sad. The ending was really bad. True. I remember you were still 18 years old at that time, right? Yes, I was 18 years old. 18 years old.

What did you do when you decided to get a divorce for the first time? 2018 I'm a camel. I'll cook on first part. I'm a colleague come on. I'm a Tuscan try And the American do you got a staggle? Did you go? Yeah, don't worry. Okay, okay, I'll go to check on Oh, Judy, I could eat right can't happy. I wanna to my money. I'm a ninja got I was just a teenager. I saw my parents' house, it wasn't easy. So, there must be something going on in the house. So, I just wanted to defend myself.

But, I came to a point where I thought, it's fine, he didn't fight with me about the marriage. When I complained Because he didn't fight with the marriage, when you complained, he didn't fight. So, it's okay. Men are not as big as their efforts. More or less, yes, there is.

But I was more like this. I was able to sit down. I can't live like this. So I thought, I can do a lot better than this. So I was like, let's do it. That must be very shocking for you.

At your young age, you had to make such a big decision, Salma. It's amazing. I have to admit that you're a strong woman. Powerful and strong woman. And when you were rejected, at your young age, what did you do?

I cried. You cried. I cried for I cried a lot. I was a 17 year old girl. I cried. I cried because I was abroad. I cried but I didn't want to ruin my family's vacation.

So, I really... Because I was a model. Even though I was a kid. The netizens often said, you're a kid, you're this and that. Do you believe me?

At the moment I was divorced, I didn't say anything to my parents. I acted like everything was fine. So your parents didn't know at the time? You cried alone in your room? Alone. I just said, I think I'm sick.

You guys, guys go. I was in the room the entire day. I cried until nightfall. But they didn't know what happened. So, you were far away from your ex-husband? Yes, he was in Egypt, and I was in Paris. So, it was like a family vacation.

So, I was like, hmm. I just cried. I cried, but it's obvious, right? Parents understand their children. When Daddy and Mommy found out? Yes.

They were joking, like, it's not just a normal fight.

Because it's only been three months.

Because it's new. It's just a fight, and it'll be better later. But it's not. Not because they continued to going to divorce her? No, because divorce is a mediation between the family. And honestly, I don't know how the communication between her parents is how to explain the divorce

So I don't know what business he did, but as far as I remember His mother called him, she called him, she asked for forgiveness I don't want to be wrong, but as far as I remember, there was communication from his mother to him To comfort, to calm down his mother His mother was not there at all I opened up to her to comfort her. To calm her down.

My mom.

Your mom? My mom is not there. Not at all. She's not here. Her dad is not here either. So it's just me who went there.

I tried to fix her phone and everything. But the answer is still, no. I want to continue. The answer is still, I don't want to continue. The answer is, of course, it's up to the mother to say it. But I was told that

my mother had fought because she felt guilty. She was the one who posted that I was wearing leggings. So she had a very big guilt. So she tried to,

I think I have to fix my children's marriage. Because one of the problems was me. That's what he was thinking. So now, how is the relationship between TM and Salma's parents? He's not good.

Not good. Not good. Not communicating. There was no communication since he said we're breaking up. Because he immediately showed his interview. There was nothing like,

Mr. Sunan, thank you for taking care of your son. I'm sorry I can't take care of him. Or I'm sorry I'm not a good match for his son. There was none of that.

That's right.

None of that. So he immediately showed his interview. And that's what made my dad go, wow. That's amazing. So he always shows the interview. And that's what made my dad like, wow. Amazing, right? Even last Eid, there was no say sorry or like, maybe an apology, not specifically for that,

for everything, we as a human being, there was no such thing. For me personally, it's quite often, not quite often, there are a few times, right? But for my parents, there really wasn't. The funny thing is, the last time I told them, if I could ask for help, please apologize to my parents.

Because I see that my parents still have something that they haven't let go of. And I don't want to see my parents like this. As children, we don't want to see our parents like this, as a child, we don't want to see our parents full of anger or unpleasant feelings, so I told him, please, I'm sorry, but there's a reason.

What's the reason he said until he fainted? He fainted. The point is, he was beaten or... Oh, you know what? He said, if possible, we meet under the media. Huh? Kachangin at Audi. Yeah, you know what katanya Guinea? Yeah, I love you. So I kept them all media

Huh? What? What's come with me? I'm a mean town to follow me in time. I'm a book of women. Yeah, then she'd be like, yeah, I love you So I put that one media What Wow what up? The people local Salmania, I am a C by Kia Why, sis? But if it's Salma, TM is still okay, right?

As normal as a human being, not like chatting, no. Not just like, okay, if for example... Just like a friend, right? Not just a friend, if for example she has a certain case, which she called negative, she apologizes. To you. Okay, I'm sorry.

After the divorce, we apologized. So it's normal. But with your parents, it's not clear yet? Not yet. If he wants to apologize, I'm okay with it. Yesterday, at the TV show, I saw Salma's father. He said that he's not clear with TM. Because he's using you personally.

So, for his personal interest, what does he mean? Shara pribadi, you know, did he book on to continue on? Apa pribadinya dia ito a poma so that's a papa kubetul. I'm doing an on Tony. It'll get a kunga. Tau arahnya kemana Tapi emang seting in a car lagi-lagi seorang bapak itu sangat wajar si kayanya kalau misalnya ngomong kayak gitu karena apa ya karena yang memang mungkin sebenarnya itu yang terjadi because, well, maybe that's what happened. So I think it's normal for a father to say that. Maybe he feels his son is being used.

You have to ask his father directly. But do you feel used by TM? Because of the communication after the divorce?

If I feel used, no. I Call on to my Rasa demand fat can go ready much mama. I'm in time. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, Chuma

Memaada sato sato pointy money. Yeah, bila is in capture. Yeah, I'm a posting

Bawa, udak, Lear get to know Yes, silakan aja's for his own interest. So people will know that we're just normal, not dramatic. If you say it nicely, it's not, sis.

Honestly.

I'm not the one who has to insist, but this is a message from my parents. Don't ever say, I'm just being nice, because as long as my parents are not fine, I can't say I'm fine.

Like that.

So, yeah,

maybe that's how I use it.

Right.

Salma has changed a lot. Since 2018, I think when the wedding was at the beginning, she was wearing hijab. And now she's so modest. With a more open look than before.

Because you were married. And you decided to convert to Islam. There are so many journeys in your life that you explore a lot. Is there a connection to your divorce and your decision that related to your divorce? To get to this point? How should I say this?

I tried to be as fair as possible. At that time, divorce was definitely sad and all that.

But...

In my opinion, in my opinion, I have tried to heal myself in a good way. By going to the psychiatrist, to the psychologist, and so on.

So, maybe this process of moving happened after I recovered. Oh, I see. So, yes, if you say the reason for moving is because of divorce,

it's not, sis. Because, what is it, I mean, if you say it's a trauma, back to what I said, trauma, but I'm happy, I'm grateful it happened, not something that destroyed my life.

I don't think so. So if you say it's destroyed, then it becomes a religious shift, becomes a apostate, becomes a Christian, it's not like that. Because it has gone through a healing process first, only after the healing, it became a Christian. process You and your mom are close, right? More like... What? More like dad, if you're being spoiled. But for the life story, it's mom. And I think dad is always the front guard. That's amazing.

When he's facing the same problem, he's always there to help. How close are you with your dad? I was a kid from elementary school to high school, I was always with my dad. I never skipped class, unless my dad was really tired. That's when the conversation started, in the car, when I was still a kid. So there are so many memories and values in life that my dad actually passed down to me. And there are so many.

We usually bond because, for example because he's dealing with a case and he often asks me, what do you think about this? We bond like that. Bonding and sharing. Bonding and sharing, yes. He teaches me a lot about how to see if a man is good or not. So, there are so many things with my dad.

I think my love for him is not less than before. It's already full. So, maybe it's like this. So, every time there's a problem, it's easier to face it. Did your parents tell you anything? Not everything.

Especially when it comes to marriage, it's not a life issue. Honestly, I felt like... It was really crazy at the time. From the moment I got divorced, then I took off my hijab, then I moved to a different religion, um I have a principle that if I'm happy, sad, angry, or emotional, I should keep it to myself so that my parents won't think about it. Because I feel like there are so many parents who think of me as a helper.

So I don't have the heart to add to their problems now. So if I tell them, I'm happy with it, but I'm not sad about it. I salute your family and you. They support you so much. Because, as you said, in two years, so many things happened. And now, what about you, Papa?

When you knew that you had to move to another religion, that was a big decision, right? What do you think about that? Now you don't have any problem with that? For that, I can't talk about it because only you and Mama can answer.

So I can't express their feelings, which I know for sure, Papa and Mama him to the job. Did he a cougar? I was asked directly to my parents because I can't, I can't, I will look selfish if I say, yes, they are just fine, even though they are not just fine. So every time I'm asked by anyone, how are you and your father? Only he can answer, I don't know what it's like inside. Salma, you have experienced an extraordinary transformation in your life at a young age, but your life experience is through a lot of transformations in your life. But you've had a lot of experiences in your life.

Yes, quite a lot. You must have experienced the lowest point in your life so far. What is your lowest point?

What is it?

Did you have a breakup? What is it? Is there a time when you broke up? No, why? I swear, this is not a picnic, I'm being honest. I'm sorry. But I never felt like I was broken. It's easy to be broken.

Because I'm always... Is it because I'm too positive? I don't know. I know that all the problems in my life, I can definitely deal with it, even if I cry, even if I'm angry, I'm angry, I'm shouting, I just deal with it, I don't know why. What does it mean? That's why if I'm asked what the lowest point is, I can't answer, because ...

In your opinion, there is no such thing low point, right? No, I don't. I can still do it even though I'm crying. So, I don't have a low point. And it's not because of privilege. Because we have to face it all by ourselves. But if you ask me about my lowest point, I'm confused.

Because as long as I can face it, I think it's okay. I don't admit it. So now you're single?

Single.

And you really choose now? To be a life partner? Because seeing your trauma, right? In the past, don't let us go into the same hole. The criteria of a man? There are so many filters, Dilan.

Like this, Dilan, no filter. I think I have too many filters. Too many. The criteria is... What is the criteria? The big line.

The first one is faith. That's the first. The second one is... He must have a good emotional maturity. For example, for me, the context is the past, divorce, being known to be a good person, there must be a pressure.

If she doesn't have a good maturity and emotional management, she can have an affair. If she has an affair, it's complicated. Or divorce again, I don't want that. So, I'm like... I have to be as emotional as possible. How she handles her emotions.

As faithful, emotionally stable. And then, she has to... be able to accept it. For example, I have a past. Everyone knows.

Can you talk to your family, explain that this is the woman I chose, regardless of anything, this is Salma, can you? Because if she can, sometimes her family doesn't want to. We are, how to say, divorced have their own stigma that is not good. We still live in Indonesia, there are still a lot of candidates for the marriage. So, there are a lot of risks for me.

Can I accept it or not? If not, then I don't have to. What are the criteria? That's it. Good looking? No, I don't think so. I'm not that important.

What's important is... Financial stable? That's a must. If I can be number one, I'll be number one. But I can't beat Iman. I need to be stable.

Because I'm tired of working. I'm like, please help me. I want to be a housewife. So I have to be stable, because I don't want to be 50-50 anymore. 50-50? I mean financially. You really want to be 50-50?

Well, it's usually like that, 50-50 Yes, usually like that 50-50 or what, but back again if 50-50 honestly, I'm not a matriarch, but how do you want to provide me? Well, it's different people's tastes, right? You can set your own standards, right? If you want to take Salma,

100, 100 Yes, so I don't want 50-50 anymore I'm really tired of 50-50

I'm really tired, I'm not 50-50 anymore. I'm so tired of 50-50.

I'm so tired. So, I'm like this. That divorce was long ago. You must have had many people approach you. I heard you dated a bully. Right.

You dated a priest's son. But, no one... No one met all the standards you set. I'm I don't think so. There's no one suitable to be married again. I don't think there is. And I'm also not that kind of person. I'm not that kind of person.

I'm not like, Oh, I want to have a girlfriend again. No. I can be single for a long time. One year, two years, three years. Then I can have a girlfriend again.

Because, back to the topic, being independent is a risk, one of them is good for yourself. So you don't think about getting a partner again or anything like that. Sometimes, yes, the same person is happier alone or with a partner? Honestly, there is a partner. Because if there is a partner, there is a friend to talk to, right? happy I'm He is not a dictator. He is more of a person who is willing to do anything. But if there is a consequence, it is up to him. So, he is not a person who is always like,

I have to do this, I have to do that. No.

You do you.

You can decide whatever you want. But if you fail or God bless you, it's all up to you. But, sorry, with your trauma, maybe not everyone can get through it. Are you afraid to getting married again? No, honestly, no.

Because, I mean,

if you ask me if I'm afraid of being cheated on, I've been cheated on before. I'm afraid of being cheated on, I've been cheated on before. So, what else have I tried in this world? I'm so sorry.

Have you ever been hit? Yes, I have. By who? The one who got married or not? I'll be a wild ball if I get hit. I've been in a toxic phase.

Until you got hit? Until. But that's it. That's it in life. What else can I do? I mean, I'm not that far, but I'm not sure if I can make it. I don't know what to look for. The thing is, if I get married,

I can say that I'm confident. I think I can face any problems my husband has. I don't want to look for anything else. No matter how toxic my husband is, God forbid, but I think that's it. You're more afraid of status than your own happiness, right?

No, I'm more like this. Let's be honest. What else is a man? Do you understand? What else? His mischiefs? If not, beating, playing with girls, money, money, like that.

It's like that, right? And everything... I think there must be a phase. I mean, even though he's nice, there will be a second or third puberty. So I'm like, what? I've prepared myself that men areada kayak. I am kayak. I was a deaf man. Yep in the reaction. Okay. Yeah, lucky lucky monkey. Get to

Yoda, I just young pentagon somebody's a lady to got our yet the empty aqua Tidak, I'm a progenitor. I can't even I'm a'll still be myself. I'll still be like... I'll still be the same. I think I can still tolerate the weirdness of the men out there.

Like that.

I've reached that point. So there's no longer like, you know what I mean? I'll just tolerate it all. The important thing is, as long as he comes home, meets his kids,

he has time for his kids, he plays with his children, he can be a good father figure for his children, at home he can be a husband, outside, it's up to God. That's it. It's up to you.

If you don't want to know, just close your eyes. Well, how do you know if you don't lose yourself when you tolerate other people's mistakes? Where does that come from? The benchmark, you're not losing yourself. To be honest, it's like a stoicism.

And I've done it when we were dating. So it's been trained. And it's wrong and negative and so it can't be copied. Honestly, because what kind of woman doesn't want to be happy, doesn't want to be carefree, and so on. Who wants to live a carefree life.

But I think I've been doing it from the beginning. And I have no intention to blame your principles or concept of life. I'm just asking, because my job is to ask. Yes, that's right. It turns out you're already at that level. At the level of tolerance.

Then you're open to anything. So tomorrow, at the next wedding, you have a lot of filters, see you will get divorced unless I don't know you can also have a rehab the reason is there's a lot of story behind it maybe, right?

but when it comes to I don't think so the other one is okay you can't say that I'm afraid you'll get hurt I can still forgive the other I'm afraid I'll be offended. But I think I can still forgive others. You can still logically think that it was something you can tolerate.

It's like this, back to the topic, as long as the house is still safe, the income is still correct, the children are enough, I am personally enough, I think it's okay.

I don't know.

It's weird, right?

It's weird.

It's not weird. But let's try to think about it.

What is it?

When a man has another woman, another woman, there are some who are definitely out of the line. He will definitely not be obedient. He will be stubborn.

The characteristics of men who, he will be stubborn. That's the characteristic of a man who is a cheater, he will definitely be stubborn. Because he has a new priority. As long as it doesn't interfere with your financial, you can still tolerate, but if it's already, how come this has an impact everywhere? so you may not tolerate it anymore, right? So, if that's the case, you assume that almost all men are like that. Do you still have confidence in your little heart that there are men who...

If I say there is no such thing, it means I don't believe it. But now, the facts in front of my eyes and what has happened are all like that. But I don't want to say, like, there is no such thing, it means I don't believe it say that I don't believe in God, but I hope there are men out there who believe in God. Even though the facts are not good. There are many men who are divorced, right? Yes.

There are many strange men in this world. The more strange, the more strange. So what can I say? I'm sorry, I can't be there. I'm gonna make a new track and winner. It's a black one. I can't make it on a So the guy I'm gonna make a new track and winner. It's a black one. I can't make it on a So the guy I'm gonna make a new track and winner. It's a black one. I can't make it on a So the guy I'm gonna make a new track and winner. issue, and then like, yeah, the thoughts, the thoughts, I wasn't mature at that time If you think about it now, it's funny too, why am I talking like that But we all humans have phases, the phase of being alaik, maybe it's the phase of the sound

Why do you think it's funny? If you think about it now, it's weird. First, we're still living in Indonesia. That's something that's very... ...rare. Second, we can't do it religiously.

I think it's just my habit when I'm looking for myself again. So at that time you didn't want to have a boyfriend, but you still wanted to have a child? Yes, because honestly, even now it's like that. But you can't, the option is no longer possible. You have to get married. Religion is not allowed.

Not allowed, not allowed. I really like small children, I always want to have children. I dream of do that. So, like... I really like kids. I always want to have kids. I dream of having kids. So, I think... If we're married and there's something going on, I'll just have my kids.

I'll take care of them.

You know?

You're really... You're so motherly. You like nurturing. You like taking care of your kids. But now, you still want to have a partner

still want to have a partner

because you are not allowed in religion? or because you already... because I think it's funny I think it's impossible religion doesn't allow it and that's it, just be normal

that's how life is now don't be too much of a mess can I include this? you know you just donated sperm Don't be too dramatic Can I say something? You know that She just donated her sperm She just gave birth

Because she's desperate for a boy She doesn't trust any other guy who won't give her a boy So she still wants to have a baby She likes a baby So she made it

I mean, there are women who make radical decisions because of trauma. So I can't judge, like, sis, that's wrong, sis, that's right. I can't say that. But you're not one of them who makes radical decisions because of trauma.

Don't get me wrong. I mean, how do I explain this? I want to try to be as normal as possible. I want to have a family, a husband, and a child. There are many things that I admire about you.

From your amazing life story, you are at a very young age, you can make big decisions, learn from your mistakes, and not blame others. I really love your parents. And your parents also love you very much. If there is an opportunity, can you tell your parents what you want to say? I'm I mean, we thank them so often, but... I want to apologize to them. Because I feel like, we're here to be just like them.

Back then, we opened up for our parents. Sometimes I feel like, I know they're not doing well. for the parents, sometimes I feel like, oh no, I know they're not doing well, and then they're like this, they're being bullied,

and I react to it, and so on. So, it's more like, maybe, often, if I'm disappointed, it's for sure,

it happens many times, but I've never been thrown away. I've never been alienated by anything. They never lack in love. I've never been separated from my parents. Orang tua mana yang ga hancur gitu ibaratnya anaknya Pisah anaknya Habis itu Pindah agama dan lain-lain

Ga semua orang tua itu mampu dan aku tahu tak kenapa Mereka mampu Karena rasa sayangnya mereka kakakku yang luar biasa lah gitu Kayanya kalau rasa sayang itu ga ada, kayaknya ga mungkin mereka mampu ngelewatin semua itu kan Dan yang pasti I think if they don't have that feeling of love, they can't get through it all. And for me, I'm sorry if there's a lot of controversy, a lot of ups and downs. But do you believe that I really tried to... ...become mature, calm, not dramatic.

I tried to live my life... ...strong, even though sometimes I'm not strong. I don't tell stories doesn't mean I'm not sad. Sometimes I want to say that. I don't tell stories doesn't mean I'm not sad, sometimes I want to say that. I'm not telling a story, it doesn't mean I'm okay. But I want my parents to know that I'm okay. Whatever the condition is.

Because I've made a lot of disappointments. So whatever it is, now, I want my parents to know that I'm happy, I'm happy, I'm healthy. I live in this world, I'm trying to be a good person. Especially because I'm already a mother. We've imagined our child with what will happen.

We must be like, oh, what to do? I'm scared. Especially since I'm a single parent. If you were given a time machine, you can go back to the past, and change one thing that you really hate. I want to go back, I want to change.

What would you want to change? To be honest, I don't have any more. Because, when I look at myself, I've been through a lot. And I've learned a lot. Sometimes I think, if I didn't have to face so many problems, where would I be now? I ask myself, what would I be doing now?

Where would I be?

Have I been able to buy that thing? Where are you? Have you bought it yourself? Have you been able to leave Tomroh people? If you don't get into that problem, what do you think your career is like now? How are you at 26 years old? Are you having fun with your friends?

What do you think you're doing? In my opinion, it's like that. So, if it doesn't happen, maybe I'm not the same as now. Maybe I'm still the same as when I asked my parents to come. I'm still the same as when I went to the same place.

It's unclear where my friends went. There are so many possibilities. Even though it doesn't close the possibilities, maybe now, if it didn't happen, I'd be happier. But no, I'm trying to be like, it's okay. Everything in this world that has happened and will happen,

there are lessons to be learned. Just take it. I don't know why. Either because people are too positive again, or too accepting, or too obedient, or whatever. I don't know. I'm always like, that's it, nothing has to be changed. Nothing has to be changed, it's okay.

If I'm not divorced, I won't select men. If I'm not like this, I won't be like that. A lot. So, after thinking about it, if I want to be changed, honestly, nothing has to be changed. I'm happy with my life, I'm happy with my experience.

I'm happy with my experience. Because it makes us stronger. So you're the one who's encouraging your parents?

Yes.

You're the one encouraging them?

Yes.

How old are they? 18 or 19 years old. So you're the one encouraging them?

Yes.

So I'm like, that's life, what else? The last one, if you have a chance to be my TM, sitting here, both of you,

you have 5 minutes, and she's not there.

Tell her what you really want to say. You only have 5 minutes, and then he's gone.

Tell him what you really want to say, directly, not by chat.

You only have 5 minutes. Believe me, I have no grudge against you. I pray that all good things to come to you. I also pray that you have changed, that you have become a more mature person. But please, please, forgive all my parents,

because their pain is still felt until now and which child is able to see their parents in pain? because honestly after you it's really hard to get through my parents

to like to bring other people is really hard It's so hard to get through my parents' wall.

It's so hard to bring other people. Because the trauma is so big. So, please apologize. I think what their response will be, will be your consequence. Because you didn't apologize at the beginning. So, if their response is not good,

what are you going to do?

Okay.

Hush.

It's gone.

Now it's his wife's turn. Three minutes to talk to his wife. He can do anything. He's just like a hologram. So you can hit him, you can show him.

If you want it, go. I understand. You're always in a fight with me. It must be uncomfortable, because a woman's true feelings are always the same. I don't want to be a different person. I understand that. If I were you, I wouldn't be strong enough. I'm always in a fight with Salma.

But there's one thing I want you to know is that when you marry a divorced widow, you have to understand the consequences if it's related to her past. Especially a widow with a child. Someday you'll talk to her children's mother, etc.

And I hope, as time goes by, I'm going to go grow some ebony and I'm like the other night and I could hara searing Berjalan a walk to come with a levy Matan like a dilemma Lala emosi saying Ganga reactive call me sunny and I am young and gone and gone I think I could never tell you a lot I could need so that the other the heat of some evil so that I just percaya sama a cook a lot I hope your husband believes in me and that you're happy.

Amen, amen, bahagia, amen.

Okay, peace.

Bye! I hope that message reaches them directly.

Yes, yes.

And bring good impact, according to your wishes and bring good impact. Thank you so much Salma for coming to Dilan No Filter. But before we say goodbye, Salma, do you know that on April 30, 2026, there will be a film called Dilan ITB 1997? But not this Dilan.

Not this Dilan, I thought it was the one with Dilan playing. That's the viral Dilan film, right?

That's right.

I really like that movie. I'll watch it. It will be shown in the cinema. So, if you want to watch Ariel's acting, you can watch it on Dilan. Ariel Noah?

Seriously?

I want to watch it.

Please come to your favorite cinema on April 30, 2026. Thank you so much, Salma, for coming to Dilan No Filter. Because here, everything is discussed without filters. Because here, everything is discussed without filters. See you in the next episode, guys. Bye-bye.