Try Not To Laugh: The Podcast (Elimination Mode) (Again) | Smosh Mouth 147

Hi, welcome to Smosh Mouth.I'm Shane.

Kay, you trying to get f***ed or what's the deal?Hey, welcome to Smosh Mouth.I'm Amanda and we have a wonderful guest with us today, Courtney Miller.

And that's not all.

No, we have many - You didn't like that I said that, huh?Look, I don't like anything you say.

It was really fun and flirty and I thought you were going to laugh and you didn't.

I didn't think it was flirty at all.I was being weird.Oh, I thought you were - Is that what flirting is?Should I - Guys, stop fighting!

I'm actually the wrong person to figure out what flirting is.

We are playing You Laugh, You Leave again.So basically, if any one of us laughs, we have to get up and leave and we have many guests in the wings ready to hop in.

And we're doing this all in honor of Harambe.

We are filming this on May 28th, which is the 10 year anniversary.of Harambe's death.Yeah.

Wait, did you do that because it looks like in your camera that Harambe's whispering into your ear?Yeah.

No, he's talking to me.Oh, yeah.

He's looking down on me.

Well, I guess he's looking over me?

He's looking over your shoulder.Yeah, he's either the angel or the devil on your shoulder.

He's an angel.Stop it now.

Before we start, we do want to mention, we want your guys' hometown drama.Yep.If you can post this on the Smosh Reddit, we are looking for hometown drama.So we can read it?what are the stories that happened during your childhood?This could be like your high school stories or just the thing that's known in your hometown.

They will be anonymous and well, it's up to you.

It's up to you.

But we are going to read it and talk about it and you know, try to decipher anything about it.

Yeah.

Give our advice, but probably not.

Yeah.We just want to see how many parts of America and the world we can get.Yeah.You know how much hometown drama we want to hear all about the drama.

Yeah.And we also want to talk to you guys about Courtney, we're so excited that you're here.And then, Courtney, you have a cute little camera.

Yeah, and?

It's so cute.

Did the thing start?Has it started?

I think it starts now.

Okay.

It starts now.And it's fine.And don't freak out.

No.

Do not freak out.It's just if you laugh, you have to get the f*** up out of my face.

So why are you about to laugh?

I'm not about to laugh.How dare you say that?

You seem like you're about to love my guy.

No, not at all.

Selena, I'm going to need you to let me know when it's been exactly 69 minutes.Okay.Thank you.

We cut at 68.We cut at 67.

I'm not even doing the 6 -7 stuff.You guys need to stop.

I'm not doing the 6 -7 stuff either.To be honest, never did.

I did a 6 -7 joke like 10 times this morning.

That's so f***ed up.

I'm not even joking.

Anyways, we're done with 6 -7.It's dead to us.

It's done?

Yeah.I have actually not heard it outside of here in like six months.

That's not true.Or seven months.

That was good.That was real good.

He's never given me a compliment like that.It's crazy.

That was good.No, I teed it up.I think what I realized with the 6 -7 is how often We say the numbers six and seven.

Six or seven things.

You're so tight.Are you, like, so worried?I'm scared.No.Anyways, if you haven't seen You Laugh, You Leap, the first one, it was really, really fun.Very fun.

We got a little shout out from Lisa Loeb.Lisa Loeb was like, Angela, if you don't know who I am.And Lisa Loeb has her own eyeglasses company.

Big surprise.

And she talked.

I mean, that's why I said Angela looked like Lisa Loeb, because of the glasses.They were giving Lisa Loeb glasses.We love you, Lisa Loeb.

Yeah, it was super kind and complimenting how you said it to her.

I thought it was kind and complimenting.

Well, I'm not the only person here, obviously.I can't wait to see who comes out when you guys freaking laugh.

Nobody.

Wait, nobody.

Yep.The chair stays empty, and then it's just Shane and I again.Fuck.

Alone.That's the worst.

Oh, also, should we bring back the ants at some point?

We should.That was a lot of fun.

I'm gonna address the commenters.Yes, my accent sounded like Christopher Walken, and yes, sometimes it sounded like Boston, and yes, sometimes it sounded Southern.

It is so funny how you really try so hard not to mold into the accent opposite you.And it's okay.

I will say it is a problem.Anytime I'm around someone with a Southern accent and they're doing it, I have to slip into it.It was so hard.You're just like mocking them.No, I'm not mocking them.It was just hard.

I wanted to be Boston.Try going from Boston to Southern.

I don't really do a Boston, Boston.Hey, I'm from Boston.Boston.Is this like Boston?Okay, so I'm from Boston, right?I'm Boston Yod.

Now I'm getting up here.This guy's from Boston.And here's Ian.Please welcome Ian.And then I go down to Southern, but then I go back up to Boston.Okay.

You see that?You see that?

You're actually doing pretty well.

You see that dance I just did?

Try doing that for 90 minutes, bro.

I did do it for 90 minutes.

You did Southern.

I did Southern for 90 minutes.And it was very good.And I never switched to Boston.

No, you didn't.I switched all over, and you know what?That's okay.Not upset about it.

You guys want to see what's on Kourtney's phone?

I thought that was a picture of you.It's Shane.Aw.Kourtney, you shouldn't have left your phone.

Sorry.

He doesn't know your passcode.

Oh, I didn't realize Bones is mid -yell at me.in that photo.

Does your cat yell?

Oh my God.

Can you give us an impression?

Bones is like a fox.He does a different meow every single meow.

Do foxes do a different meow?

Yeah, they have foxes...

Ian, what does the fox say?

What does the fox say?That song is the best song I've ever heard in my life.Amanda, stop.

That was just for me.

Get out!

Olivia Sway everybody No, so bones bones will be like he does like a lot of like chatty stuff so back And then and then when he gets like really he's really hungry He'll meow in a way where he scrunches his whole face at me.

He'll be like This just sounds like The porkchop sandwiches guy.

Wa -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba -ba Yeah, we've seen the poop in your pants.

You're about to laugh.That is so inappropriate to say to me as my boss.

Yeah, Ian.All right.I don't really think I'm your boss.

That's right.You're not.

You don't report up to me. I don't.

Olivia specifically doesn't.

Olivia actually, it's this weird carve out that she has no boss ever, legally speaking.

In my contract it says, I answer to no one.I don't answer to Ian.I'll listen to everyone else but Ian.

So what's your opinion on shoes, Olivia?Okay.What's your opinion on clouds?

Clouds?

Oh, what's your favorite cloud?

My favorite cloud?Yeah.Like in the sky?

Well, yeah, there's different types of clouds.Lenticular clouds, cumulonimbus clouds.

I think he's making this up.

No, the nimbus clouds, that's a real one.We don't have to talk about clouds.

You don't have a favorite?You're going to sit here.

Are you hot in that?

Yes.

Are you going to Iceland?

I'm dying right now.I'm freaking dying.You could take it off.

You could take it off.Just take it off.

No, because my nipples would show then.

No, it wouldn't.You're wearing a shirt.

And I'm pretty sure I'm lactating right now.OK, Ian.

I do want to say that Ian keeps saying that he does not talk about milk or lactating, and he's the one who brought it up.So I just want to put that down for the record.Did everyone hear that?Harambe, did you hear that, bud?

Hmm Harambe.Noah Grossman ladies and gentlemen.Thank you.Thank you.Thank you By the way, we're allowed to have normal conversations Yeah, we are so I want to say, you know, just letting you guys know like we're trying to make each other laugh We're allowed to just talk just talk, you know Like Shane and I are kind of obsessed with like horror TV and horror movies all the time.

Oh, you know what?I just the series I just finished watching Twin Peaks just finished at this dude, which one the original or the original?

I tried to, so I watched the first season, and then I started the second season, I truly hit a point where I was like, I can't.Oh, it gets difficult.

It gets difficult, but there's something so wonderful and campy, cherry pie vibes about it.Nothing means anything.

I think he's just f***ing with everyone.So much means so much.It's a comedy.Twin Peaks is a comedy.I think David Lynch is Funny, I think he just truly was like, I can make whatever the hell I want, and people are gonna think that it's deep, like...

What?I think you just f*** with everyone.Wait, that's your David Lynch?

Well, I don't actually know...how he talks.

I feel like if you did a David, I feel like it's like, her, her, it's me. I don't know.That is probably what he sounds like.Was that better?We want to know what the f*** Twin Peaks is about, ask me.

Yeah, you want to know what Twin Peaks is?

Yeah.

Got you.

Oh, f*** you did.

Come back here, juice girl.Sit down.

Hey, you ever wonder if though...When you walk into Joe and the Juice, you go, so you got back there.

You know what I say to him?That is the stupidest thing I've ever heard.What you got for us, Liv?

Yeah, what is the juice that Joe has?

And is it worth the squeeze?It's a lot of pressed juice.I've gone to many Joe's.They have a really delicious sandwich.

Oh, it was like a trendy sandwich, right?

Spicy tuna sandwich.I love a spicy tuna sandwich.

I wouldn't expect a man named Joe to come up with a sandwich.

Joe as in coffee.

Oh, but there's a man on the cover.That's not Joe?

Cup of Joe.

Oh, yeah, you're totally right.

The other night, I was in bed reading.I got really hungry.So I had one potato in my fridge, and I boiled it.You keep your potatoes in the fridge?Well, I don't want to see it.You don't want to see the potato?

What?

What's so funny?I'm really hanging on here.So I didn't aesthetically didn't want to see the potato in my kitchen.Okay, I hide it cabinet maybe then it starts growing green and stuff.

Okay, and it doesn't do that in the fridge growing green.

I wish you guys can see Shane is so just like what the hell is she talking about?

Okay, soyou took cold potato and made cold potato into boiled potato.

Yeah, yeah, I boiled one potato and then, it actually takes a long time to boil a potato.Yes, it does.

How big of a potato are we talking?Like Idaho potato?

This big.

A modest potato.And then I ate it.

Okay.

How did you eat it?Did you pour salt on it?

Important question.

Girl, I feel like I should say yes.I did pour salt on it.

You ate that raw like just straight up hot water potato for dinner Yes.

Wow.

Did you use a fork at least?

No I put in a paper towel and then I went back to bed.I put I ate it in bed.

Stop.You ate a boiled potato in bed?

Yeah, kind of like, you know, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory?

Okay, how is boiled potato?Do they eat boiled potatoes in bed?Oh, just eating in bed.Yeah, living in bed.

Yeah, but they didn't make the food and then go back to the bed.They couldn't leave the bed.All four of them lived in one bed and saved up from the toothpaste factory for one chocolate bar for the whole family to split.

How does that work?Like, two, four grandparents in one bed.Like, are they?There's something going on.

So Charlie and Chocolate Factory isn't real.

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Who has time to replace your mattress every few years?I don't.

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I love it.I mean, I slept on my Casper mattress last night and it was amazing.I'm still thinking about it right now.It's like soft and cooling and also firm.Oh, I just wanna go back to it.

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All right, back to the show.Good night.Good night.Wait, I wanna dive deeper into what you think could be going on.

What do you guys think is going on in that?

At that age, why wouldn't you?

Wouldn't that get really confusing though?Because it would almost be like incest, but it's not.

Oh, so you're saying if one pair of grandparents swung with another pair of grandparents, is that incest?

Because then what if...

There's no genetics, right?

But then they have a baby, right?

Then what do you call that baby?That's your father now, I think.That's crazy.

Sorry.Get in here.Let's talk about this, Shane.I know you're dying to talk.

Okay, think about it.I think it's an uncle.You have an uncle.That's an uncle?An uncle that's younger than you?I guess so.

I think people do genuinely have uncles that are younger than them.That happens a lot.That does happen.Yeah, that's an uncle.

That's an uncle.So, we think the old parents in that small littlein Willy Wonka were incestual.

I never had those thoughts, but I will say that watching...Same.I just got on.I gotta hold it together a little bit.

It was very hard.When you said, I never had those thoughts, it was very...

But you watched Charlie and the Chocolate Factory as a kid.Excuse?What?Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.You watch that as a kid, and you certainly get to that scene, and you're just like, what is going on here?I mean, it's gotta be one of the most, like, troublesome things to watch.

Like, you get to the, as a kid watching it, and they get to the chocolate factory, and all this shit's happening, and the Oompa Loompas and everything, and I'm still like, I'm sorry, what was going on with those grandparents in the bed?I'm not kidding, I really was confused by it.What's the boy's name who's like, don't do that!Augustus Gloop?Augustus, no!Yeah, that stuff is happening.

But I'm saying, once and once the grandpa gets out of the bed and stands up, is like dancing around.If I'm his son, if I'm the dad, I'm shooting him immediately.I'm like, what the f**k dad?

Yeah, so I'm f**king shooting him.

I will say the laundry.Remember when the mom has a song for some reason in the movie?Which mom?The mom.Exactly.Right.

She deserves more.Never remember.She's doing laundry.Whole childhood I thought she was making soup.But it was not.It was not a big soup.

I mean, it is a soup of clothes.

What kind of soup were you thinking?It's a cabbage.I looked like cabbage.

It's a clothing soup.If you think about it, laundry is just clothing.Augustus, no.Are you doing, Kal -El, no.Kal -El, no.

No.

You need the stone.

No.What is that from?Do another impression.

That's really all I have is Gal Gadot.

No, you worked so hard.In our sketch day, Ian, you had an Arnold Schwarzenegger under your belt.Come on.go.Arnold, hey.You did Batman.

I'll be right back.

I said to do a Batman.

Come on.

Which Batman?Arnold.Arnold.Arnold.I'll be right back.It was an impression of an impression.

This is Arnold sick.I got the COVID.

That was awesome.

Anyways, soup.Wow, it's just the ladies.

I thought about it longer.

Tell me.

Okay, so the grandparents.Oh my gosh, it's the ladies.It's the ladies.The grandparents in the bed.So, if one set of the grandparents had sex, right, and then they had a child, that child would be related to both husband and wife of Charlie, his parents.

Half siblings to Charlie's parents.Yeah, yeah.

Unk?And so I think that can happen.I think there are unique situations in the world that that has happened.And if you're listening, please reach out.

Yeah, reach out and let us know what you guys thought about the old people in the small bed in Willy Wonka.

It looked like a vibe.It kind of did.Did they, like, were their feet, like, by their hips?Yeah.

Lookit, they were like this.Kind of scissored up.They were scissoring up all night.When I was a teenager.Maybe a little younger.I would be really bored in the summer, and I would find new ways to make my life more interesting, so I'd sleep sideways.

Oh, I'm glad that went there, because I wasn't sure what summer party we were going to have.Sleep sideways?

On a twin bed?

You could fit.I'm small.

Olivia is really tiny.

Yeah.My legs would be like, from here, any Airbnb, this and this is off a bed.

Always?

like, I remember being so excited to sleep sideways.

Uh huh.

I remember being excited about sleeping.I do remember sleeping the wrong way.Like, like putting feet where your head is and being like, Whoa, that's it.

It's honestly kind of sick.

Just like an exciting like you guys try sleeping like a different direction tonight.

Okay.

I would like for a smosh video, maybe even for a podcast episode, getting a king bed with with backboards, four of us sitting in the bed like the Willy Wonka movie, and we see who's touching where.No, no, no.What are you talking about?

We figure out the anatomy of their sleeping position.

We're in the Willy Wonka bed.We do it.

You're talking about almost like a true crime investigation of like, let's map out this scene of what was going on.

We're going to figure out who's touching where, but mostly we get to do the bed.That sounds so fun.Sitting in the bed with our backs on the boards and our legs in the touch.

I feel like this could end up being a play off -Broadway where it just follows the grandparents.And it's like two of them are secretly having an affair.

That's what I'm saying.

And without the others knowing.

That's what I'm saying.But they're all in the bed.And then they pop out some half -siblings.And they have the birth in bed.The birth in bed?Because they can't get up.

I don't like this.I don't like this.I want to move on.

This is a nightmare.Olivia you're reading yeast of Eden.I am yeast of you didn't I I have it on my it's it's on my next like up to read I've been meaning to read that book forever.

What are you reading right now?

I just started this book called dungeon crawler Carl, but it is funny.Um, I read a book called angel down.That was insane Guess what happens angel down?

Yes.So are you more of like story or like?

It goes back and forth Shane's crazy He'll do a story book physical book.And then when he gets in his car, it's a like a nonfiction audiobook Yeah, I do.

I do audio.I do nonfiction for audiobooks.

Would some people consider listening audiobooks reading still?

Yeah, that's I don't that's not reading that one is better for the brain than the other but both are they both count I think they they just they're probably Like, whatever, they're stimulating different, like, things in the brain, sure.

Stimulating what shit?

I don't really care.

You're married.Don't be stimulating shit.

I don't think one is better than the other.In fact, I do struggle with audiobooks more, and I'm like, I need to do this more to, like, get better at my, like, attentive...

I don't remember ever since...

That's why I do nonfiction for audiobooks, because I lose my place a lot.Like, my mind drifts a lot.

What nonfiction are you listening to?

It's called There's No Place for Us.It's about... homelessness in America.It just won the Pulitzer, so I was like, I need to check this out.How did you like it so far?It's fascinating.It follows five different families.

Wow.You said, I have struggled with listening to books ever since - Ever since my concussion.And we should talk about that.

And that's why we, we actually planned all of this today to talk about.

Well, I know that I became nicer after my concussion.

Whoa.I never said that.

Only Keith said that.

I actually think, I actually think I, I feel like I joined Smosh shortly before or after that happened.So I don't know.I don't have any frame of reference.

Ian's laughing.

Ian's laughing at you.This is true.How messy.

It's not true.It's not true.I've always been a very nice lady.

It's, I think that's true.You have like lifelong friends and everything.So I would believe that you do.Like, you have friends who you've been with for so long that you must be a nice person.

I pay them.That's not a funny joke.I might make myself laugh.

You're okay.

Don't.No.

Don't.

Stop it.Olivia.Olivia.

Olivia, stop it.Stop it.

What other insane things can I say to you guys?

I know this is a very like normal version of...Get the f*** out of here.What if I broke my ankle?

This is okay.What if I go to my therapist's office and just decide to sit like this?

It is actually insane how far you're...Noah.So are you going fishing later?

Yeah, I'm thinking I'll go fishing and I'll sit like this.

Everybody has more flexibility than me.This looks flexible to you?

That's very flexible.

I am struggling.

That's flexible.Can you see the strain?But it's still flexible.Okay.It looks comfortable.I gotta stop.

It's not.

And it looks great with a fishing vest.Thank you.Or a scout vest.

I appreciate it.It's a fly fishing vest.

Shane, I think it's because for the first 15 years that you worked out at the gym, you never stretched a day in your life.

It's true.I was really bad about it.I know.It's so weird.I can't get the motivation to stretch.Because you kind of have to be alone with your thoughts.

Because when you're stretching, You know, no, you know, it's the same as working out dude.It's a little different cuz working out.I don't know I'm enthralled.I love you is really mad at you right now I don't know why cuz stretching you have to hold a stretch for like 60 seconds.So you have to like sit there Yeah, that's why yoga is all stretching cuz it's like it is a meditation.Are you guys fighting?

Oh opposite?

I think we're having a nice little foot time Both gone This is brutal for Noah because like Noah naturally just like laughs as he talks.I don't think I could do this.Sorry.It's a flexibility thing, but also my hips are not open.Look at this shit!

Okay, brag much?I can't do that.

Let me tell you.

That's a mother right there.You're telling me if I birth a child, I can do this?

No, no, no.I've been like this forever.You have to f***ing stretch.

No, I'm going to get pregnant.

I'm going to get pregnant.I do hear you.You can, should.I do hear you about like, it's all in your mind.Get out of here.My hips?

No, it's hard to like stretch because you're like, I'm thinking about it, but what if you listen to your audio book while you're doing it?

Yeah, well, what I have been doing, Courtney can attest, past couple days, as we're watching TV, I'll stretch in front of the TV.I'll lay out a yoga mat, and I'll be stretching while there's a show on.And you just have to deal, well, you laughed, so.What the fuck am I supposed to do with that?Olivia chose you, and that's, Olivia isn't even, she is kind of posed like it's picture day at school.Everyone's posed all weird on the mics.

Okay, so they're over there.Courtney and Olivia are doing their own thing, so.Now I'm just here by myself, feels like.

Let's gang up on him.Let's?

I dare you.

Oh, yeah?

You're outmatched.

Outmatched.

Yeah.Okay, go for it.What do you got?Poop, poop, poop.No, no, no.Olivia, thoughts?

Do you own a vest?

Sweater vest.Right?I own a sweater vest.

You own a few vests.What?

Nice.

What?

What vests do I own?

Why are you lying to us?Oh, I'm sorry.You forgot your suit.

That doesn't apply to me.

The newest one does.

I don't think it does.

It does.

How do you know?

Because I looked at it and I pay attention.Yep.Yep.Yep.Shane.

I got a Navy suit.

Got you.Yeah, Shane, we got you.We got you.

So I got a Navy suit.Classic, some may say.

When are you going to wear it?

At the wedding soon.

What wedding?

My cousin's getting married.

What's your cousin?What's your cousin?What's my cousin?What your cousin?

What your cousin?Olivia, you had a podcast for a little bit.I did have a podcast for a little bit.Called Fish Cheeks.Which cheek were you talking about?Don't just look at me.

Just like Fish Cheeks.Actually Fish Cheeks.

Honestly, just Fish Cheeks.You guys, you went to Anajac.Did you order the branzino?

The Fish Cheeks are the best part.It's a delicacy.Oh, that was a place?

Yeah, she went to a restaurant that I really like and they have a really delicious branzino there and then people and the head is on the fish and then you eat the cheek and then my friend eats the eyeballs.

Oh, that's next level.

Yeah.

I'm not at that.I'm not that level of eating eyeballs.

And what level would you describe yourself at?

Me?

I guess Ian of eyeball eating.

I wouldn't eat eyeballs.I mean, the thing is, like, if we've all eaten hot dogs, we've probably all eaten like pig rectum at this point.Yeah, but I we were talking about fish eyes.

I mean we've probably all eaten pig rectum That's that's the unfortunate thing if you guys had to choose the Titanic death for you, which one Oh propeller guy You're telling me you don't know propeller guy I've seen Titanic yes, yeah, yeah, there's the guy whofalls.He's holding on to the end of the railing as it starts to lift up and break in half, and he falls onto one of the big propellers.

He falls, and then he goes off the propeller and flips into the water.Yeah, you hear it.

So you want to be that guy?

Yeah, because it's the most epic death that happens there.The rich people, they're just like, oh, we're just going to drink.and go down with the ship.Wasn't that actually supposed to be one of the, it wasn't a Rockefeller, but there was some famous old money multi -millionaire that was on that ship, and it was an Astor?Astor, I hardly know her.

And we will move on to the next segment.

Unfortunate.

I appreciate it.

Have you always worn glasses?

No.When did you find out that you were being blinded?over time.I feel like there's some like you're hiding something about these glasses Is it just me or does it feel like there's more to this story this way?

You guys you fall in love.Okay.I have a question.Where are you going?All right, you follow?Okay, you're in love with the most perfect person already ideal ideal soulmate person, but they wear frames without lenses.

Oh That one that one's in a complete deal -breaker because I feel like you that's gonna be a clip if you're gonna fake it If you're gonna fake it, I'm glad you decided for us That one's going to be the clip.

Is it not going to be?

What's wrong?

It's funny.I'm making myself laugh.So, OK, go on.So, okay, what if you meet the soulmate, whatever.

And they don't have lenses in their glasses?

Just frame.

Just frame is rough.I think there's obviously people that wear, well, we know somebody that wears, they wear glasses sometimes and they don't have lenses.

Prescription lenses who I do that too, but I'm saying no lens.

Yeah, like you you can go like this Yeah, no, that's that's some goofy Halloween type.

That's how you take headshots when you're a child Really?Yeah, we got her everyone is taking headshots as a child knows it the process of getting headshots done when you're a child is Getting like three or four outfits all the same tint of green because it complements your eyes And then you spend like two hours with a woman just kind of flashing your eyes and taking pictures.

Oh Oh, okay.Did you ever do, like, dark films?

No.Or comedies?Well, technically, I've been in a film that's very, very dark, as in the reality of what's occurring on camera.You'll never know how dark and illegal it is.But by watching the content, everything's fine.Awesome.

Yeah, that's totally separate.

I think the first time I got headshots, I was not a kid.I was a little bit older.Oh, yeah.And they were not headshots.They were like what I thought were headshots.But they were like weird model shots in Boston.

And they looked so weird.

It's like even weirder than a than a school day picture.

Yeah, they're they're the weirdest thing school day pictures were.That was a fight to the death for me.Because I never liked my clothes, so I always wanted to steal my sister's clothes, and it was like Mission Impossible the night before picture day.I would take a shirt, and then I would put it on, and then put a jacket over it, and try to get in the car with my sister and get there.Wow.

Yeah, I almost got killed that day.Sorry, let me get this straight.Are you okay?He's struggling, I think.

Oh, because you're not wearing anything?

glasses.Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry.So the grandparents slept foot to head, or were they head, head, head?

Ian, are those real lenses?

Yeah.This is what's crazy, because I got LASIK, and I think once I got LASIK, it feels like you found lenses.Remember?

Oh, poor Noah.You had big, big sunglasses on, and any time the sun would hit your eyes, you were just...Yeah.So many tears.

Yeah, and every time I told someone I got LASIK, they were like, oh, see, that's why you don't get LASIK.And I was like, I just got it.That's a great time to start this conversation.Yeah.So then I felt like I had to become a salesperson.I had to really pitch LASIK to people.

I'm not laughing.I'm smiling and enjoying the moment.

I just have a sneeze coming.We should maybe try to get him to laugh.OK.Why are you guys trying to make me laugh?Breast milk.That's good.

Weird trains.

Whoa.

Weird train?I don't know, I'm just thinking it.Go on.Weird train.

This episode of Smosh Mouth is sponsored by Shopify.Did you guys see our spring collection that dropped on the Smosh website?

Oh my goodness, so many cute options.

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Whoa, I didn't know that.Tell me more.

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com slash Smosh.Back to the show.I don't think I've ever said anything about trains.I don't think you have either.Because your thing is highways.Yeah.

That's just a fact.

What's your guys' favorite?I don't like highways that much.

Well, I don't like them either.

I use them.I don't like them either.I just have favorites.Have you ever seen photos of like old Los Angeles where there's so much public transit?Like there's all the trolleys everywhere.I was like, oh my God, we got rid of this?

And there were so many problems with them too.Cause there's always like 10 people tied up on one track and one person tied up on the other track.And that was just happening all over Los Angeles.

Nice.I mean, yeah, Amanda and I did that show.Yes.

And it was crazy.So trains.Yeah.Trains.Um, what's your what's your favorite nature documentary?

Um, I truly anything with David Attenborough.I rock with that shit.So old now.I love him.He looks great.And he's killing it, dude.

Yeah.Have you heard about the documentary where a woman has 1000 men run a train?Oh, that tell me more.There's a train.

And doesn't that excite you?I don't like trains.I've never even been on a train.You've never been on a train?I've never been on a train.

The surf liner...

Why would I be on a f***ing train?

The train from Los Angeles to San Diego is genuinely one of the coolest...Oh, so you have.So that was a lie.Of course, yeah, I love trains.So you're lying about that.What else are you lying about?

Lying about your glasses.I don't know, maybe my glasses are fake.

I mean, when I look at your eyes now, I do see like, cause you know, when you can tell it's a prescription when the, where their skin, there's a warp.I don't really see much of a warp.

But they're probably a low prescription.Mine are pretty low.Mine are low prescription.I basically wear glasses only when I do ad reads because of the teleprompter.It's just far enough that it's like fuzzy.And I'm like, I need glasses for this.

I'm supposed to wear glasses.I barely passed the vision test when I renewed my license.because my left pupils f***ed up.And so I did the right side and I was like, nice.And they're like, OK, another eye.And I was like, oh, f***.

And then when you put glasses on, I become one of those like horrifying close ups from SpongeBob.Yeah.You're like, oh, and you like take your glasses off.

Yeah, I don't wear glasses to protect myself from shame.

Yeah.This show, you know what I forgot is painful about this show is when you're off to the sides and then people are like having conversations about things that you want to talk about.

Yeah.

You guys brought up Branzino.What do you think?You want to talk about I've never had Branzino, but I I think I want to make it is it I want to make it Branzino just see Is it just a fancy way of saying sea bass?Branzino is a fish that's from like Greece, right?Oh Well, I would love that cuz yeah, you take the whole fish you like you make cuts in it You fill it with seasonings.You just do it whole Okay.

Oh Yeah, she eats it like this.She grabs it by the tail and you just go.

Oh Yeah

Oh, yeah.

Sure, we got an oven here.I don't know if we're picking up any of your audio, but if you want to keep talking, I'll just say exactly what you're saying, like one second after.

I am surprised you guys don't have a boom.URL has a boom.

Oh, URL has a boom?

Yeah.Just in case.

You're a loser.

Already said that one on there.Yeah, feel the shame.Don't do that.

Makes Amanda laugh, but nobody else.See, I knew I would ricochet.The only way to make Courtney laugh is to make Amanda laugh.

The only time Ian doesn't wear glasses when he's driving.

That's especially when I wear my glasses.No, you can't see things far away.

I realized we were recording.You've you've had multiple outfits today because we did a Reddit stories earlier today.You had a different outfit.You had a whole different outfit.

Yeah, because I'm a professional.

Oh, see, I do the thing.See what I do for these shoot days.I have one pair of pants and I Two different shirts.

Oh, that's smart.Yeah, I just didn't like the synergy between the pants that I brought.That's tough.So I had to bring the whole fit.You're only changing pants?No, I changed everything.

You changed everything?You brought different jackets.

You're changing your underwear?

Yeah, it's more of a spiritual thing.Yeah, because I had to feel different, you know?

So you guys have a favorite pair?

So one's like chainmail and one's made of fish scales.

Oh, okay.Which one's your favorite pair?They give you different power -ups.Underwear.

Oh, me undies.

Does it have like a little like fly?

Like, oh, this is the thing that we talked about with Spencer where it's like he goes, he uses that.

Of course.

Yeah, I don't.I go over.

You go over.

Talk about you're talking about the underwear that like the flap and like, do you like go through it?

or do you just If you have a zipper fly for your for your jeans, it just makes sense to pull it through I'm not I feel very comfortable talking about my wiener.

This is what we talked about in the first you laugh you leave so oh, yeah, okay But we don't have to talk about it again, you know, that's what Spencer.

Do you have a problem with with the fly?

No, I just, I, I, I, I, do you guys wear skims?

I don't wear skims.

Do you know skims?Yeah.Do they have skims for him?Yes.

Oh.I've got some good Calvin Kleins that I like.

Okay.

Those are, those are fancy.Those are nice.

Very nice.Those feel good.

I feel like if you have Calvin Kleins, you have to like show it off in the waistband.No, I don't really.You gotta hike that shit up.No.You know?No.

And just everywhere you go be like.

No.

Are those new pants?I've never seen you wear pants like that.

These are not new pants.I've had these for a couple of years now, but I, I, There's some of my favorites.

When is the right time to wash your jeans and pants every time you wear them?

Some would say never.So salvaged denim heads have this whole thing of like you go for as long as you can without washing them.

Yeah.

Because then it builds up the natural fade lines and everything and stuff.But I don't know.I kind of play it by like vibe.That's how I wash my ass.Okay, I play it by vibe.10 wears of jeans.

But what if you're going to Korean barbecue?

Oh, see, that's a full that I need one of those things, you know, in sci fi movies when they like leave like a thing and they get like sprayed and everything you need that because I smell like Korean barbecue for a week.

I think and they have always bad closets where you can put your clothes in and it just like sanitize and it takes out the smell.

Oh, wow.Yeah, it's like if you're near a bonfire or any sort of barbecue.It's like you're gonna smell like that forever Yeah, I dress accordingly when I'm going to like barbecue spot nothing Have you ever thankful you ever put your jeans in a freezer?Noapparently that doesn't Apparently that might work for the smell, but it's not like it's cleaning it.It's just I don't know I also never I'm like no I've got I want to use my freezer for other things I put some potatoes in there you would put potatoes everywhere, okay, but out on the counter We close you're close to laughing that make you almost laugh You almost laughed.

I just don't understand your relationship with potatoes.You had one potato.

Did you only have one potato in your fridge?

Yeah, that's what I said.

You just had one.

I had one potato.

And then you took it out.

I took it out and I put it in water, boiled it.

Did you salt the water?

No.Oh, I should have, huh?I didn't do that.

Oh, sorry.Do you peel it?

No, I ate the skin.

You ate the skin?

Oh, the skin is really good.

Yeah.

I have potatoes all the time.I eat a ton of sweet potatoes.

Oh, I love sweet potatoes.

I know, but...Okay, you're talking about like a russet?

This wasn't a russet either.It didn't have like...A golden?

A Yukon?

Yeah, it was a Yukon.

Oh.

It's like buttery.

But you didn't have any butter on it.

No, I thought about it, but then I didn't do it.

And you said you ate this in bed.Yeah.Was it on a plate or a paper towel?

Oh, napkin, paper towel.

Okay, so paper towel, and you just fisted it.You just put it in your hand and you took a bite.

Yeah, I fisted a potato while I was reading East of Eden.

I mean, that's one -handed, because isn't that a farm?

Yeah.

Is that what inspired you?

Yes, maybe it was a subconscious, like, Let me get a touch.

Yeah, very different.Let me get it because it would have been kind of if you're eating grapes of wrath.It's like you guys wish you had one of these, you know, grapes, no potato.Oh, because it's the dust bowl.

Okay, I was thinking like, and then when I'm reading Lord of the Flies, you're like, I'm a girl.

So

Oh yeah, there were no...I was saying, like, eating flies or something.

Eating!

Oh yeah.Yeah.

And...Name a book.

I did.I did.Lord of the Flies at the East of Eden.

Name another.

Oh, you read Secret History.

I did.I loved that book.

I loved that book.

I loved that book.That book was so good.

I loved that book.It was so good.

Okay.Being for real for a moment.Hey guys.

Oh my God, we're like the grandparents in bed.

Courtney's very uncomfortable by this.She's giving a very grossed out face.Probably everybody in this room is.

I've never felt your hands before.

My hands?

Yeah, they're soft.

We've worked here for 10 years.They are soft.

Why would I be holding my co -worker's hand?That's inappropriate.

Yeah, and I'm always saying that.Yeah, Shane.

I always see you walking around with one of our co -workers and you're holding their hand.Spencer.Yeah, and it's making us all very uncomfortable.

Okay, man, deal with it.We can talk about whatever we want.

Have you guys ever wanted to go on a submarine?

No, I'm not into discovering stuff in the ocean.No, no, no.

You don't have to discover.You could just look at a fish or something.

I don't want to.

I think I went on Disneyland.They got the Nemo ride.That's a little submarine.

I don't want to do stuff like that.

They do a little submarine.

I'd rather go into space than go in water.

Really?

Yeah.

You'd rather go all the way up into space.

Feels more discovered and safe.

Space is more discovered.

Yeah.Who do we have discovering ocean stuff?James Cameron, only James Cameron.

I think it's just James Cameron.And Jacques Cousteau.

So wait, so does that mean there's Avatar in the ocean?

I believe, I think it's a real film.

I think it's a documentary.

I would like that.Okay, I'm just gonna get out of here.Mission accomplished, I think.Mom's here.So I'm just going to talk about myself now because we can change topics.

Go ahead, Noah.

I'm fostering two cats.

We're going to listen to Noah talk about himself now.

Yeah, I'm fostering two little kittens right now.What are their names?So they were given to me as Iggy and Sabbath.It's from a litter named after like rock stars and rock bands.Yeah.But I just call them the diarrhea twins.

because they're brother and sister and they love to shit with each other.They'll be facing opposite directions and they'll both just diarrhea kind of next to each other.The themes today are outrageous.It's the truth.

Incestual old people, potatoes and fridges without salt or butter, and diarrhea twins.Yeah.My goodness.Terrific.It's such a powerful stank.

Ew!Ew!

It, like, permeates my apartment at this point.They will be leaving soon.They're gonna go get adopted.They're going up to San Francisco.Why don't you throw away the...I'm fostering.

Did you ask if I was gonna throw them away?No.

No, why don't you throw away the...Why don't you throw away the poop?

Oh, I do, but it's just because they don't mean for it, but it's like they are in it.And you gotta keep wiping them.And at a certain point, you just can't stop... cleaning a cat that doesn't want to be cleaned, and it's like a little demon covered in diarrhea.And so at a certain point, you do what you can, and then you just put it back in its little pen area.

I think this is good for you to know how it feels like to have a baby.

Yeah, I'm learning that I don't think I'd be good at it.

Babies don't just diarrhea all the time everywhere.Yeah, they do.

Tell me more about this.

Yeah, they do.

they have like blowouts?

Yes.They have blowouts.They do shit all the way up to their neck.That is true.So yeah.I mean I wasn't even trying to make you laugh.

It's a fact.Like they do have blowouts where they'll literally be sitting there and they're like.The babies?And then it's a blowout up to their head.

I heard that when you have a little boy baby and they're peeing, sometimes it shoots up into your face.

Yeah, well, I have a little hack because I've been peed on, you know, a bit.So I now am like, I'm ready for it.I know exactly when he's gonna pee.No, I take the diaper and I put another diaper underneath, and then I whip out the diaper and I put the other diaper on top.Because once it hits cold air, let me tell you, they're peeing.Really?

Yeah, the stream is flowing.Have you been peed on?I can't believe I'm talking about this.You've been peed on?Yeah.Not by choice.

No, not by choice.

And even if that's what you're into.

It actually doesn't, it's not even that crazy anymore.That's not what I'm into.

I wasn't trying to talk about that.

I wish you just ignored it.We can go back.I was going to, but everyone, it's a podcast.Everyone can hear everything.

No, they can't.

Eric says yes.

That is sometimes I think about it.It's like, well, they'll cut that.But the people in the room heard it.

Oh, we don't cut anything on Smosh Mouth.We love to keep it all in.Really?Yes.There's so many things.So much potato stuff.

It's going to be the highlight.

They have a whole folder of potato stuff Olivia has said that needs to be cut.

I will say I love eating potatoes just plain.It's so good.Boiled, no salt, no butter, just popping it in.And also, I also read books and then listen to audiobooks.I'm listening toFamesick right now, and it is so good.

That is whose book?Lena Dunham's.

Oh, I do need a...

It's a very, very good book.

You know how I like a potato?Mashed, lots of butter, impregnated with sweet corn.Whoa, guys, huh?Lots of sweet corn.That sounds really good.And you just shovel that shit.

When's the last time you had that?Couple nights ago.You made it?Didn't make it.I was at a restaurant.It was like a...

Where do they have that?It was like an Irish restaurant.No, no, no, Scottish restaurant.And they had cream corn and mashed potatoes.

I think I know where that was.

Like the Boston Market?No, it's...That's a Boston...That's like an Irish restaurant, right?It's like near Toluca Lake, I think.It's called Tam's O'Shanto.

Oh, I've always...It's in Atwater.Walt Disney's favorite restaurant.That place is a blast.

I had a Welsh rare bit there.

You have one cocktail, and you leave being like, what happened to me?

Really?Yes.

It's carpeted head to toe, and you're just like, what happened to me?

I haven't felt that way in a long time, and I would really like to get that way.

We got you.How's that hand doing?Why are you resting it like that?

Is it broken?God.

Also, let me just say, I do put my jeans in the freezer.Dude.

Whoa.Technically, that does kill bacteria.There are certain bacteria that can't live in super cold temperatures, just like when you boil water, that kills bacteria.But it doesn't necessarily get rid of the stink.You can boil them.

You can boil your jeans.You can boil your jeans.It might change the shape.Wait, you can bowl your jeans.

Bowl jeans.You can bowl your jeans.Bowl your jeans.You both are gone.Bye girls!

and I just cannot do any more caffeine.So, you know what I had?The Brodo bone broth, and it actually, I feel so much better.

That makes sense.The broths are made from scratch, no concentrates or preservatives.Did you know that Brodo was actually launched by James Beard award -winning chef Marco Canora?

I love a chef that knows how to make a mean broth.

11 years ago, he started serving bone broth out of the window of his New York City restaurant.Now, Brodo ships nationwide.Before, I was flying to New York for it, and I just, you know, got out of hand.

Wow, that's why you were gone?

I know.

Hey, worth it for that Brodo bone broth.My favorite is the chicken with turmeric and ginger.It is so good.It gives me a little pep in my step.

Shop the best broth on the planet with Brodo.Head to brodo .com slash SmoshMouth for 20 % off your first subscription order and use code SmoshMouth for an additional $10 off.Once again, that's brodo .com slash SmoshMouth for 20 % off your first subscription order and an additional $10 off if you use my promo code SmoshMouth.

Now back to Brodo bone broth, baby.

Let's go.I miss you girls All right.Whoa jackets off.

All right.Welcome to URL.

Okay What's your internet history go?

What have I been doing on the internet?

Oh, we all watch that bird watching documentary.

Yeah listers.It's incredible.It was so good Love that one That was incredible.

Yeah.

Yeah, you took the jacket off got too hot for the podcast listeners.

The jacket is off Okay, no, I I patted it earlier.So it's it's dry.Yeah, very Yeah, my chest is my chest is very hairy.It's funny cuz like Sometimes I'll go running shirtless and I feel like I feel like every guy shaves their chest now It's very strange interesting or waxing.I don't know.Yeah, you know the only person that goes like

goes like shirt off with body I never thought about that when I see people running or jogging in in Los Angeles all these years I don't think I've ever seen a like a really hairy dude running They they need to get out where the Bears at do you think maybe it's because I?

Guys who are more naturally hairless are just, for some reason, more comfortable to take the shirt off?Am I honest?

I think more so it's like guys that have nice bodies that want to show off the gains, want to shave off their body hair to show the muscles, which I don't have.and I just don't care.Shaving all my body hair off seems like a lot of work.That's a lot of work.

Yeah.

You know what I like?In Heated Rivalry, there's this one guy that it's not super hairy.He is hairy, but it wasn't shaved off.It was almost like he got it trimmed and it looked so clean.

Like a manicured Happy Trail kind of solution?

No, it was up here.It was all one length.It looked not even real.I was like, Give me a picture.

You're talking about the barista.

Yes.The smoothie guy.Is my phone there?

No, that show is insane.

Okay, hold on one second.Especially that storyline.I was like, Jesus, I need to...

I thought I was...

Heated rivalry, smoothie guy, shirtless.Images.Minus AI.

Yeah, make sure to add the minus AI.AI heated rivalry.

You find it?I feel like, yeah...

Doing this Come on share share with the class Courtney share with the class.

Okay.

I'm just trying to find a high -res one Oh, yeah, we got to see each individual follicle.

No, I remember we Courtney never watching heated rivalry together the whole time.She'sgoing...It came to these scenes and it's like, he looks insane.He does not look real.

Oh, okay.

Okay, let me, and then I gotta show the guys.

Oh, yeah, come on, share some with the guys.

I remember these scenes.I remember these scenes.

I actually hate that.

Oh, you hate that?

It looks like well -gardened.

Oh, let me see, let me see.Yeah.No, it's, it's...Oh yeah, he's probably using, yeah, he's using like a...He's shaving it at like a three.Yeah, he's using like a head.

So, head.

So, no head.

I'll airdrop.I'm going to screenshot this and airdrop it to you, Noah.

To everybody in the office.

Yeah, who's up on the airdrop right now?Here, Caroline.Damn it.

This must be yours.Oh, that was just in there.

Tyler, you need a code to airdrop you, by the way.

It's...It says happy day.I'm not giving that away to anyone.

Airline accepted.Eric.Eric, I need a code.

Looks insane.Yeah.Oh, yeah.Rivalry.Yeah.Yeah.

They're hockey players except for him.He's a barista but he also looks like that.

More like hot key players.Hot key players.

Yeah.Hotkey Olivia just has continued to be part of the conversation Olivia you need to do this out in public where like you go somewhere like at a restaurant you go and sit by yourself and a Table nearby you just kind of join their conversation.

I feel like she does do that.You should just do that Yeah, I feel like Olivia can strike up a conversation with like any random group and have a great time I feel like you've done that a lot in your life This is my now this is my impression of Olivia like just like if you're in the middle

of a whoa you're in the middle of a conversation and Then like Olivia's just nearby and she's just like what's the deal with that?Okay guys, can I ask like, okay?Um, if I'm like if I have a temperature of a hundred and ten, is that bad?Okay.No, I know I'm just asking no, I was curious and she just calls them chat and chat.She would never say that.

What do you think about that?

Olivia would never say Olivia is not a chat girly.

Olivia would simply never say that.

You can't catch Olivia dead near chat.I did.

I did have a lady do this to me at an airport lounge.It was Anthony and I were sitting there talking and she just straight joined our conversation.

Were you at a bar?

It was kind of like a restaurant table and she was in a table next to us and and she was by herself and and you know, I'm not gonna tell her to like I'm not back.

Oh So hey, don't quote that guy.Can I can I know can I ask like generally what you were you guys talking about?Like I have I don't remember but she just joy.How did you remember how she joined the conversation at all?

No, cuz it was it was like an inconsequential conversation and she weighed in and then Anthony got up and and went somewhere else, and then I was stuck talking to this 70 -something -year -old lady for 45 minutes to an hour.Yeah, she told me all about her travels, and she told me about her medical conditions, and she told me about her kids, and about how she used to run a bakery in Oregon.Yeah.

And then she's like, my name's Betty Crocker.And you looked away for one second.You look back and she was gone.

No.And then we banged in the bathroom.

grandpa style i'm not grandpa froggy style no no we did the old razzmatazz no no we did the old honky tonk got himself i knew he would get himself i wish we could talk about the guy he quoted just moments ago We can't I can't find his social stuff or I can't find his social stuff anywhere.

Oh So you have two kittens right now?Yeah, I've got two two kittens.

That's really amazing two poopy kitties.Yeah, two little poopy kitties It's nice to have a little bit of energy in the house.My other cats hate them.That's fine How many cats total do you have now for but I've got two on my own one of which is whom Courtney Yeah, I was able to adopt.

We haven't told that story on smash have we?

No Have we not ever?

I don't know.

Yeah, a cat showed up at your door.

I was literally in my courtyard and heard a little... and there's this little white kitty, tiny kitten, ran right to me, and I was like, oh my gosh, it was just immediately attached, and I was like, crap, I gotta do something about this.Brought it in, and my cats were used to the cat cafe life, so they didn't even bat an eye at a cat in the house.Kept it in the bathroom, because it was covered in fleas, and then I tried driving around town to find a vet, and it's like all the vets were closing, and then I managed to book a room, An emergency appointment for like 9 p .m.

To go check if they're okay And then I literally was like texting I was like because you had been like nesting you were getting ready to like get a cat It was incredible the day before you found Babybel who became Babybel the cat Was when I got my cat tree and the like cat pooper all the stuff literally just got delivered from Chewy cuz I was like I want to have a cat I want to get a nice pet with my girlfriend, and it just lined up amazingly.

It's crazy.Yeah, it's crazy like I literally just sent you a picture was like You want a cat?And you were like, wait, seriously?And then I just handed little baby off to you to take to that vet?appointment, and it was ever since.

Yeah, she had fleas, she had worms.She gave birth to a worm out her butt on our couch.

That's right.

Yeah, it was incredible.I've heard about that happening.Oh yeah, it's when, I mean, I'm happy I didn't see it.I was sent a picture, but my girlfriend had to fight it to get it out of the cat's butt.Because when they realize that it's not a safe place, they try to go back in.

We're gonna bleep all of this.

Oh, yeah, sorry.It's like a horror film.

No, and that's how we know that it wasn't like someone's kitten that was gone only for a few hours.Like, that was a wild kitten.

And based on her meow, it sounds like she didn't even drink water.It was probably like a motor oil puddle.

You know what I mean?

She's got this little raspy meow.

Oh, let's switch it up, but no man now.She's doing great now.She's lovely healthy cat so fat.

Oh my gosh.

She's gigantic That is like that is that is why cats?Domesticated themselves you know what I mean like cats did everything they could they were like we got it We got to get out of the wilderness Yeah, and then they're like oh we get to eat as much as we want now and just hang out It's weird when I like When I spend a day at home, on a weekend, and I'm just like, oh, this is what you guys do all day, every day.That's crazy.They'll be napping, and they'll get up, and they'll be like, I'm gonna go take a nap somewhere else.I'm just like, thank God.

What a life.I did not grow up with a lot of cats around me. I grew up with like six dogs.Not my family, but every holiday it was like 1 ,000 cats.Like Golden Retrievers, or Labs, or Shih Tzus, or all these crazy dogs.

See, I love dogs.Me too.Were you a tall child, Amanda?Were you tall from the get -go?Yes.Okay.

Because, again, I had a dog family dog, but I was always a very small child.Dogs were fun, but it was like being in, you know, the lion's den.King.Oh, Stampede.

Oh, it's funny that you brought this up because the other day I was just thinking about how I was holding my aunt's dog.I'll never forget it.I was young.I think I was like four or five and he was a big lap and I was holding him on a leash and he decided to like go for something.And I was lifted in the air, like flew in the air, like, no, holding him on a leash.And I was like, How did I not rip my face or something?

How did I not rub against the, I don't know what happened, but I'll never forget that memory.

I'm not gonna call you out for laughing at your own story, because it was such a pure memory.

Oh, I laughed.

It was such a pure memory, and I enjoyed that moment.No, you're right.I'm so sorry.

Checkmate, I'm outta here.

Sorry, Amanda, you gotta go.I forgot!See, I grew up, I had two cats when I was first born.

Dude, just make me laugh.Just make me laugh.

What the f***, Olivia?

Make me f***ing laugh.

I can't even think about what to say to make you laugh.I think, Olivia, I have to let things just, like, settle for a bit.

It's been, we've been here for 60 minutes.

I never say jokes that make you laugh.

Yeah, you do.

What's a joke that I've said that's made you laugh?Is there one that you can think of?Like from the past.

Oh, I thought of one.But then it's a joke that I said to you that made you laugh.

Oh, so you said that made me laugh.Courtney and I were laughing at Okay, now I'm back to Claire recently.Oh, yeah, that's that might be my favorite.I mean, you're your first ever tntl joke for me still makes me laugh.Martin score crazy.Oh, yeah.

Stupid.Now I'm back to Claire is such a classic.

Yeah, I've got like three that are good and probably like 997 that are so many that are good.We just were pumping them out back in the day.It's like baseball.You know what?I got a home run that one time and we won the game.Doesn't matter.

That is very true.That is extremely true.Um...

Oh, Claire, I was...to be, I forget now what they're called, but I'm going to call them like wolf.That was my phone that just fell off.

You were like turning into a werewolf.You're like, I'm turning into a werewolf.And then you like revert back to, revert back.

I've seen videos online of people who pretend to be animals and then they form their own little packs in the woods.It is such Midwest.

Oh my God.I love that joke.Yeah.

Mm -hmm.Well, you're a werewolf, but how genuinely when you come back and you look at us you go, okay now I'm back to Claire.Mm -hmm.And it was so good.

Yeah, I tried to take the mindset of someone who is in charge like the lead I would say like partner of the the alpha male.Yeah, like the alpha I guess female would be that character.

Yeah, did you say it?Can you do it again?

I couldn't do the bit I could do that do the entire bit or do the banjo one we're singing by down the Okay, Olivia's making herself laugh here.I'm so happy.I think, I think she got herself.Oh, now that...Okay, now we're...Whoa, we finally got...

It's the boys.Yeah, so...This, this...Yeah, we were in LAX.What nobody asked for.Doing SEX.

Okay.All right.He just came right back where he left off.

Do you guys want to go back to talking about me having sex with an old woman in the LAX?

I didn't know that was even a topic.You've done that?

No, but it was a joke.It does make me think about...What does me having sex with an old woman in LAX remind you of?

It makes me think about whenever I'm at the airport and the thing I clock every time I'm at the airport, especially when I'm there at like 5 or 6 a .m., there's always someone there with a full drink.Oh, yeah, and I'm always like damn.Oh, yeah, always like real.

I'm like, whoa like You're wait, is that a loophole if I open a bar in LA, but I claim that it's like a private airport Oh, you could have it open 24 connect.

It's just like 24 -7, but they just they serve out they serve alcohol like kind of all the timeat airports No, I'm actually looking past you at Scott who's going like this Scott knows Scott knots like hell Yeah, the crazy thing is like in the airport lounges.

The alcohol is free and it is open bar and I don't I've I don't think I've ever look I had alcohol at a in a lounge.

I haven't, but I like, look, I like a drink, but I think airports, I don't understand why they make it so available because you're about to get on a flight for five hours and be stuck in a tube with a bunch of other people for...

Well, that's what gives us all the great TikTok content.Oh my God, man.Anyways, well.What do you think, what kind of freak out do you think you'll get canceled for?What?I think like the airport like an airport freakouts or Like do you think it's gonna be like a kid like walking on your lawn?

And you're like, I don't have a lawn so I don't have to worry about it.

I'm saying like in the future by a man I was in the car with Keith and he almost crashed into us obviously doing something wrong and he got out the car acting like he was gonna fight us and this is this is the issue is I Will gladly join in so like I had my window down.We're laughing at him.We're like making faces and stuff And he started so you're making faces at him because he got out his car like you're going like us.Yes I was like, what are you gonna do?What are you gonna do?You're gonna come fight us.

That's what you're gonna do So he starts coming over like he's gonna fight us.So I roll up my window and he almost hit you.Oh Almost hit you.I almost hit us.I mean inches.And it was his fault.

It was 100 % his fault.

Fully his fault, like he almost t -bones you.And then you made faces at him.

Yes, I did.I mean, that's...See, if I nearly hit someone and I get out and they're laughing, I'm like, okay, good.I'm fine.I'm gonna get in my car and get out of here.Because that was my fault.

Yeah.

But when somebody's angry and then you laugh at their face, it just makes them...

It's devastating.You have to.It is devastating.

There was a guy that was tailgating me super hard, and we were going through a residential street.There's multiple stop signs down this road, and every time I'm making sure I do a nice full and complete stop for this d*** bag.Got a complete stop for that d***.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Got to.Otherwise, I'm just blowing straight through them.That's a joke.And so it helps us know.So I come to the stop, and then he decides he's going to just blow through the stop.Go into the opposing traffic.

Go through the stop sign.And me being a little petty was like, well, I'm just going to accelerate and not let him.Love it.And then of course I let him in because he was insane and then I like blare my horn and then he stops the car in the middle of the road and then gets out of his car and he starts yelling at me and I'm just like and I'm just kind of like laughing at him and he's just getting more and more angry and then like after like two minutes of him yelling I had all my windows up and I was playing music and I wasn't gonna stop my music for this guy and then like after two minutes I was just like I can't hear you That's awesome.And then, and then he just got really, really mad.And, and then he tried to walk towards my car and I just reversed my car a little bit.

It was very fun.

I, yeah.

Oh, she's right.Olivia is correct.This is like episode one of beef.

Yeah.Well, it was based off of my life.I, it was based off of my life.

I'm very scared.Really?Oh, well in LA, LA road rage happens literally every day.Oh yeah.I see.I'm very scared of LA drivers.

Cause I'm like, I don't want to piss people off.I don't know who you are, but.I'm thinking if if I end up in a situation like that where someone's next to me and they're like trying to yell or whatever I think what I'm gonna do is like try to be like I'm gonna try to confuse them As opposed to like being like I can't hear you or laughing at them or yelling back I'm just gonna make them think that maybe like they're in the simulation a little bit so I'm gonna give them a little bit of just kind of like and like try to have my head spin 360 and then you know just give him a weird look you know yeah it's kind of or like i always wondered like if if like playing if like playing like a crazy act if somebody's like about it was like about to mug you And then you just act absolutely insane if that would work on them?

In my own experience, it wasn't insanity.It was just trying to be like a little...I can only describe as like a chihuahua.That's how I was in it.Chihuahua?Yes, like a chihuahua.

Sorry, you got robbed?Chihuahua.No, I wasn't robbed.I was I was in a car accident long story short I can't give all the details currently but this person was realistically under the influence and Threatened to beat me up and leave me there on the side of the road I got LASIK after because my glasses were lost in the accident and I was like, oh if someone were to just Nearly end my life.I literally could not identify them Oh, and so yeah, but it was one of those and so I had like no percent on my phone Maybe like two three percent.So I just acted like I was filming the whole time and just was yelling Wow Use out use out crazy them.

Yes, but but by just trying to be loud and like, you know back up like you were said You're gonna hit me. I rewatched it.I thought I was like, wow, I really stood up for myself at rewatching situations like that I mean never I would never release it publicly because you sound I mean, my girlfriend couldn't love me anymore if she saw this.I'm sitting there and I'm like, you sir!You tried to hit me, sir!You hit me with your car and you threatened to beat me up, sir!No, you back up!

You back up, sir!This is ridiculous!mean so quickly so quickly It was it's so embarrassing.

Okay, Selena.Has it been 69 minutes?

Oh, you had something planned for 69?Is that the only one?You had one queued up?A single?You had a single fart queued up?

Okay Wow, um, thank you Courtney for ending it on a fart note Guys, we have talked about so much wild things.Not enough.It has been amazing, and also a fever dream.And Noah, that story was very, very funny.

I enjoyed every moment with you guys.

Thank you for being here.Noah, Ian, Olivia, Sway.

Looked at me and said Ian.

Ian, Olivia, Noah, Courtney, and Shan.

Now I'm like afraid to laugh.Can I laugh now?

You can laugh.This was You Laugh, You Leave, part two.Thanks, guys, for talking about everything wild.And what we want to really know is, where are the grandparents?

Think about it.

Were they porking?

Because if they had a child, it would be half.

OK, everyone come in.Everyone come in.OK, everyone.

It would be half -sibling, and it would be really awkward.

Guys, let us know if you want a version 3.Guys, draw some fanfic.Send us fanfics, fan art of the grandparents, Porkin.Oh my god.You can send it directly to Amanda's email.

It is mommydommy69 at AOL .com.Okay.All right, guys.We love you all.Thanks for being here.